Strategies to help families of children with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and other challenges sidestep common sources of stress

Writer: Karen Cicero

Clinical Experts: Michelle Thirkield, PsyD , Nechama Sorscher, PhD

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDmenwIA0K4

What You'll Learn

- How do I create routines for my child during the holidays?

- How can I prevent meltdowns for my child at holiday gatherings?

- How do I make holiday travel less stressful for my kid?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Interrupted routines

- Anxiety around extended family and visitors

- Picky eaters

- Sensory issues

- Traveling with kids

- Giving gifts

From Thanksgiving to New Year’s, holiday excitement can be overwhelming for some children, especially those with autism, ADHD, sensory challenges, or anxiety. Here are some ways to make the season more enjoyable for everyone.

- If breaks in routines are a problem for your child, give them a few weeks’ warning before the start of school vacation. Sign kids up for camps or library story times and create a written or visual schedule for the break.

- It can help to host holiday events at home, where children feel more comfortable.

- Discuss expectations with kids about proper behavior at a party.

- For kids with social anxiety, give them time to adjust after you arrive at someone else’s house before they need to greet people.

- If large gatherings overwhelm your child, ask the host in advance for a quiet spot your kid can retreat to when needed.

- For picky eaters, bringing familiar foods to parties can ease mealtime stress.

- For kids with sensory issues, pick holiday clothes in soft fabrics and that don’t have tags.

- If you’re traveling, driving may be preferable to long car rides. It can be manageable with planned breaks and engaging activities.

- You might role-play opening gifts so kids can practice saying “thank you” even if it’s not what they hoped for.

- Guide relatives on appropriate presents — the more specific the better — focusing more on experiences than physical gifts.

From Thanksgiving to New Year’s, expectations run high for holiday celebrations and cherished family traditions. But all that excitement and the break from routines may overwhelm some children, including those who have sensory challenges, ADHD, anxiety, or autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Making celebrations kid-friendly can take some adjustments.

Chantelle French always imagined that when she had kids, she’d continue to sleep over at her parents’ house on Christmas Eve along with other relatives. But her daughter, Charli, who was diagnosed with autism at age 2, was so miserable spending the night away from home that French decided to rethink the tradition.

“I realized that we have a different kind of family, and we had to say ‘no’ to some things, even if it meant breaking tradition,” recalls French, who also has a 5-year-old daughter with ASD. “I cried a lot about it, but I think we’ve gotten used to having Christmas morning at home before heading to my parents’ house in the afternoon. My whole family has done a great job of adjusting to this.”

For parents of children with behavioral challenges, there’s another layer of holiday stress on top of the decorating, cooking, and shopping. “During this time, we hear more often from parents who are struggling with setting limits and seeing more behavioral difficulties,” says Michelle Thirkield, PsyD, a psychologist in the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute.

According to Dr. Thirkield, the “most wonderful time of the year” unsettles children for a variety of reasons. Large gatherings tend to overwhelm those with autism and social anxiety. Bright lights, dressy clothes, and loud music can feel intolerable for children with sensory processing issues. And a long winter recess from school upsets students who crave routine and structure. Add to that uncommon foods (hello, noodle kugel) from cooks who don’t take “no thanks” for an answer, and it’s a recipe for a meltdown.

For each of these stressful holiday situations and others, experts and experienced parents provide their favorite tips. Even though the seasonal festivities with kids who have challenges may look different than the glamorized versions on your Instagram feed, they can be every bit as joyful.

Interrupted routines

My child lives for their routine, but we’ve got a two-week winter break coming up. How are we going to survive?

Plan in advance. “Think about how you can add a sense of structure to the break,” Dr. Thirkield says. “For instance, you could research what day camp programs are offered in your area during holiday break and sign up for one that works for your schedule and interests.” Local aquariums, science centers, gymnastic centers, youth theaters, and children’s museums may offer an interest-specific day-camp options, while those at the neighborhood YMCA or JCC tend to keep kids busy all day long with a variety of activities ranging from sports to crafts. If you don’t want a full-day program, you could look into story time at the library or a drop-in program at a museum where you have a family membership (some libraries also have museum passes you can borrow). “Going to the playground or taking a walk around at a certain time every day also helps fulfill the desire for structure,” Dr. Thirkield says.

Give a heads-up. Don’t wait until the first day of break to tell your child that school will be closed for the next two weeks. And you definitely don’t want them hearing it for the first time at school when their teachers say, “See you next year!” Around the second week of December, explain when and why school is closed in a way that is most developmentally appropriate to your child — and some of your holiday stress may be prevented.

Create a written or visual schedule for break. “Share it with your child multiple times,” suggests Nechama Sorscher, PhD, author of the forthcomingYour Neurodiverse Child: How to Help Kids with Learning, Attention, and Neurocognitive Challenges Thrive. “You want to be sure they understand and are prepared for any plan you might have made.” While some kids may enjoy surprises (“Guess what, we’re seeing the lights at the zoo tonight!”), those with autism can react poorly when activities are sprung on them. “As a constant reminder of what’s coming up, we post the schedule on the fridge so our kids can refer to it anytime,” says Alicia Trautwein, director of the blog The Mom Kind and mom of four children, ages 10 to 22, with various challenges.

Stick with school bedtimes as much as possible. Eventually, break is going to be over, and it will be more difficult to get back in the groove if the kids have been consistently going to bed several hours later than usual, says Dr. Thirkield. Of course, there can be one-time exceptions, like staying up until midnight on New Year’s Eve.

Anxiety around extended family and visitors

I’m worried that my child is going to have a meltdown during a holiday gathering at a relative’s house — it’s happened before, and I felt judged.

Give your kids home field advantage. After some trial and error (with the emphasis on error), Trautwein discovered that it was easier to host Thanksgiving than travel for it. “Sure it was literally two days of nonstop cooking, but I knew I’d have what the kids would eat and they’d have safe spaces in the house to hang out at when they felt overwhelmed.” To trim prep time, assign guests a dish to bring or order some premade sides from a supermarket or restaurant.

Plan ahead. Shannon Rosa, who has two children with ADHD and one with autism, hosts Thanksgiving and Christmas, but she also finds a way to visit friends and family for more casual post-Christmas festivities. Planning ahead has saved the day on more than one occasion, she says  “Tell the host ahead of time — even when you’re accepting the invitation — that your kids get easily overwhelmed and burned out, and ask where in their house can they retreat to if they’re feeling that way,” Rosa says. Then, of course, alert the kids to where the safe spot is. 

Time it right. Don’t arrive at a gathering immediately after a long car ride. Instead, research a nearby park where kids can stretch their legs for 30 minutes or so, and then make your entrance when the kids are more refreshed.

Discuss expectations with your kids. Whether you’re having company or visiting, tell your kids what you expect from them based on their capabilities. “You might tell an older child, for instance, that you’d like them to visit with guests for 30 minutes and then they can feel free to do their own thing,” says  Dr. Thirkield. If some kids can only muster, a “hi” and “bye,” that’s OK, too.

Give time to warm up. Especially if children with social anxiety aren’t on their own turf, allow them to settle in — and hang onto their toy or tablet — before they’re thrust into greetings from relatives that they haven’t seen in a year.  Also, don’t require your child to hug relatives if they don’t feel comfortable doing so. A high five, fist bump, or wave acknowledges the family member, too.

Build in time between visits. If one day is very active with lots of company or visiting, make sure the next day is restful and quiet, especially for kids with autism. “Their brains can get overwhelmed and cause autistic burnout, when they withdraw completely,” says Dr. Sorscher.

Picky eaters

Food is the love language in my family — and my child is very sensitive to textures and has a limited diet.

Loop in family members. “Tell the host and some guests in advance that your child has eating challenges, and you’re working on them,” says Dr. Thirkield. “Doing so will hopefully make them supporters and reduce the likelihood of insensitive, hurtful comments.” French warns that children, including nonverbal ones, are aware when relatives are talking about them, so shut down any conversation at the get-together about your child’s eating habits.

Bring your child’s food. A gracious host may offer to make something special for your picky eater (“No problem, I could bake a mac ‘n cheese!”), but feel free to turn down the offer if it won’t work (“Thank you! But he really only likes a certain brand, so if we could just use the microwave to heat up a dish I bring, I’d appreciate it!”) A bento-type box filled with finger foods — like crackers, cheese cubes, and grapes — work particularly well to bring to a guest’s house. If you live nearby, feeding picky eaters at home first is another kid-friendly holiday strategy. Consider it a win (and praise them) if they nibble on anything else, even if they didn’t like it. (“I’m proud that you tasted your aunt’s pumpkin bread, even though you didn’t like it this time.”)

Give kids a comfortable space. Being squished at a noisy Thanksgiving table makes some kids with challenges too uncomfortable to eat or engage in any way. Set up a kids’ table with fidget toys and favors. You could also consider bringing your child’s favorite plate and cup.

Sensory issues

I see kids dressed up in their matching holiday clothes, and I wish that could be us. My kids would never wear anything like that!

Choose a color scheme. “We did matching clothes for three years, and when that wasn’t working, we shifted to a red-and-green theme. It still looked festive, but each of the kids could select what was comfortable for them,” says Trautwein. If you celebrate Hanukkah, consider a combination of blue, white, and silver.

Focus on soft fabrics and tagless items. “That’s pretty much all my kids wear,” says French, who started her business Forever French Baby by making kids’ pajamas out of soft bamboo and Spandex when her daughter wouldn’t tolerate wearing any clothes.

Give kids a say. If your child is old enough, show them a few outfits online and ask them for their preference. Dr. Thirkield adds, “Finding the middle path in a way, with something that’s holiday-esque and that kids helped us pick out, is a great solution.”

Add a soft layer. For dress clothes that kids do like but aren’t the softest, add a T-shirt underlayer. “That’s been how we’ve been able to do costumes,” French adds. But try to avoid clothes that may make kids feel hot, which may further aggravate kids with sensory challenges and cause holiday stress. For instance, be satisfied if your child will wear a cute dress — and don’t push it by attempting the fancy coat. Leggings under a dress are a more comfortable alternative to tights or bare legs are fine in warmer climates. For boys, a bow tie may cause less sensory issues than a necktie.

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Traveling with kids

Most of our family and friends live out of town, so we’re going to be traveling a bunch this year. I’m worried it’s going to be a nightmare.

Drive when you can. For kids with challenges, particularly autism and sensory sensitivities, a 10-hour drive is usually better than a 90-minute plane ride — especially if the drive is broken up into two days, says Dr. Sorscher. “Kids with autism typically do surprisingly well in the car because they don’t mind boring, repetitive tasks,” she says. “Planes are more challenging because there’s a lot of waiting, transitioning, and unfamiliar noises.” If you do need to fly, look at these tips to make the airport a smoother experience.

Look for bonding moments. If you’re driving together for a long period, use it as an opportunity to create traditions, suggests Dr. Thirkield. Mutually agree on a car game to play before you leave. For instance, you could create a visual scavenger hunt game card (or find a printable online) with items like an inflatable snowman, bakery, car with antlers, and other holiday-themed objects you might encounter on the road.

Pack distractions and favorite snacks. “For each child, we would pack crayons, coloring books, mini action figures or dolls, and other small fun toys in a bucket that they could easily reach,” says Trautwein. It’s also fine to relax screen-time rules for these special occasions, assures Dr. Thirkield. While some kids may be happiest watching their favorite movie over and over, you can download something new for them to enjoy.

Extend bathroom breaks. Allow kids to run around a safe grassy area at rest stops to blow off some steam before the next leg of the journey.

Giving gifts

My child never has that jumping for joy, viral video reaction to gifts. Sometimes they don’t even care to open them, other times they’ll tell the gift giver it’s not what they wanted or liked.

Role-play opening presents. For kids who are into gifts, role-play saying “thank you” to the gift giver, even if it’s not what they hoped for. Tell your child that if they receive something that they don’t want, they can discuss with you privately at home.

Guide relatives to preferences. Telling grandparents to buy “something soccer-related” isn’t enough to go on. Parents reported that relatives appreciated a specific link to an item that your child may have seen at the store or in a catalog rather than general preferences. 

Prioritize experiences over gifts. Especially when kids are young, tell relatives that a family membership to the local children’s museum, tickets to a sensory-friendly event, or another experience would be greatly preferred over a wrapped gift that your child may show no interest in opening. “My kids didn’t open a single holiday gift for years,” says French. “But it gets better with each passing year, and you start your own traditions.  At some point, you don’t even wish it were different anymore.” https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16202

James Donaldson on Mental Health - 24 Ways to Make the Holidays Kid-Friendly

Strategies to help families of children with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and other challenges sidestep common sources of stress

Writer: Karen Cicero

Clinical Experts: Michelle Thirkield, PsyD , Nechama Sorscher, PhD

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDmenwIA0K4

What You'll Learn

- How do I create routines for my child during the holidays?
- How can I prevent meltdowns for my child at holiday gatherings?
- How do I make holiday travel less stressful for my kid?
- Quick Read
- Full Article
- Interrupted routines
- Anxiety around extended family and visitors
- Picky eaters
- Sensory issues
- Traveling with kids
- Giving gifts

From Thanksgiving to New Year’s, holiday excitement can be overwhelming for some children, especially those with autism, ADHD, sensory challenges, or anxiety. Here are some ways to make the season more enjoyable for everyone.

- If breaks in routines are a problem for your child, give them a few weeks’ warning before the start of school vacation. Sign kids up for camps or library story times and create a written or visual schedule for the break.
- It can help to host holiday events at home, where children feel more comfortable.
- Discuss expectations with kids about proper behavior at a party.
- For kids with social anxiety, give them time to adjust after you arrive at someone else’s house before they need to greet people.
- If large gatherings overwhelm your child, ask the host in advance for a quiet spot your kid can retreat to when needed.
- For picky eaters, bringing familiar foods to parties can ease mealtime stress.
- For kids with sensory issues, pick holiday clothes in soft fabrics and that don’t have tags.
- If you’re traveling, driving may be preferable to long car rides. It can be manageable with planned breaks and engaging activities.
- You might role-play opening gifts so kids can practice saying “thank you” even if it’s not what they hoped for.
- Guide relatives on appropriate presents — the more specific the better — focusing more on experiences than physical gifts.

From Thanksgiving to New Year’s, expectations run high for holiday celebrations and cherished family traditions. But all that excitement and the break from routines may overwhelm some children, including those who have sensory challenges, ADHD, anxiety, or autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Making celebrations kid-friendly can take some adjustments.

Chantelle French always imagined that when she had kids, she’d continue to sleep over at her parents’ house on Christmas Eve along with other relatives. But her daughter, Charli, who was diagnosed with autism at age 2, was so miserable spending the night away from home that French decided to rethink the tradition.

“I realized that we have a different kind of family, and we had to say ‘no’ to some things, even if it meant breaking tradition,” recalls French, who also has a 5-year-old daughter with ASD. “I cried a lot about it, but I think we’ve gotten used to having Christmas morning at home before heading to my parents’ house in the afternoon. My whole family has done a great job of adjusting to this.”

For parents of children with behavioral challenges, there’s another layer of holiday stress on top of the decorating, cooking, and shopping. “During this time, we hear more often from parents who are struggling with setting limits and seeing more behavioral difficulties,” says Michelle Thirkield, PsyD, a psychologist in the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute.

According to Dr. Thirkield, the “most wonderful time of the year” unsettles children for a variety of reasons. Large gatherings tend to overwhelm those with autism and social anxiety. Bright lights, dressy clothes, and loud music can feel intolerable for children with sensory processing issues. And a long winter recess from school upsets students who crave routine and structure. Add to that uncommon foods (hello, noodle kugel) from cooks who don’t take “no thanks” for an answer, and it’s a recipe for a meltdown.

For each of these stressful holiday situations and others, experts and experienced parents provide their favorite tips. Even though the seasonal festivities with kids who have challenges may look different than the glamorized versions on your Instagram feed, they can be every bit as joyful.

Interrupted routines

My child lives for their routine, but we’ve got a two-week winter break coming up. How are we going to survive?

Plan in advance. “Think about how you can add a sense of structure to the break,” Dr. Thirkield says. “For instance, you could research what day camp programs are offered in your area during holiday break and sign up for one that works for your schedule and interests.” Local aquariums, science centers, gymnastic centers, youth theaters, and children’s museums may offer an interest-specific day-camp options, while those at the neighborhood YMCA or JCC tend to keep kids busy all day long with a variety of activities ranging from sports to crafts. If you don’t want a full-day program, you could look into story time at the library or a drop-in program at a museum where you have a family membership (some libraries also have museum passes you can borrow). “Going to the playground or taking a walk around at a certain time every day also helps fulfill the desire for structure,” Dr. Thirkield says.

Give a heads-up. Don’t wait until the first day of break to tell your child that school will be closed for the next two weeks. And you definitely don’t want them hearing it for the first time at school when their teachers say, “See you next year!” Around the second week of December, explain when and why school is closed in a way that is most developmentally appropriate to your child — and some of your holiday stress may be prevented.

Create a written or visual schedule for break. “Share it with your child multiple times,” suggests Nechama Sorscher, PhD, author of the forthcomingYour Neurodiverse Child: How to Help Kids with Learning, Attention, and Neurocognitive Challenges Thrive. “You want to be sure they understand and are prepared for any plan you might have made.” While some kids may enjoy surprises (“Guess what, we’re seeing the lights at the zoo tonight!”), those with autism can react poorly when activities are sprung on them. “As a constant reminder of what’s coming up, we post the schedule on the fridge so our kids can refer to it anytime,” says Alicia Trautwein, director of the blog The Mom Kind and mom of four children, ages 10 to 22, with various challenges.

Stick with school bedtimes as much as possible. Eventually, break is going to be over, and it will be more difficult to get back in the groove if the kids have been consistently going to bed several hours later than usual, says Dr. Thirkield. Of course, there can be one-time exceptions, like staying up until midnight on New Year’s Eve.

Anxiety around extended family and visitors

I’m worried that my child is going to have a meltdown during a holiday gathering at a relative’s house — it’s happened before, and I felt judged.

Give your kids home field advantage. After some trial and error (with the emphasis on error), Trautwein discovered that it was easier to host Thanksgiving than travel for it. “Sure it was literally two days of nonstop cooking, but I knew I’d have what the kids would eat and they’d have safe spaces in the house to hang out at when they felt overwhelmed.” To trim prep time, assign guests a dish to bring or order some premade sides from a supermarket or restaurant.

Plan ahead. Shannon Rosa, who has two children with ADHD and one with autism, hosts Thanksgiving and Christmas, but she also finds a way to visit friends and family for more casual post-Christmas festivities. Planning ahead has saved the day on more than one occasion, she says  “Tell the host ahead of time — even when you’re accepting the invitation — that your kids get easily overwhelmed and burned out, and ask where in their house can they retreat to if they’re feeling that way,” Rosa says. Then, of course, alert the kids to where the safe spot is. 

Time it right. Don’t arrive at a gathering immediately after a long car ride. Instead, research a nearby park where kids can stretch their legs for 30 minutes or so, and then make your entrance when the kids are more refreshed.

Discuss expectations with your kids. Whether you’re having company or visiting, tell your kids what you expect from them based on their capabilities. “You might tell an older child, for instance, that you’d like them to visit with guests for 30 minutes and then they can feel free to do their own thing,” says  Dr. Thirkield. If some kids can only muster, a “hi” and “bye,” that’s OK, too.

Give time to warm up. Especially if children with social anxiety aren’t on their own turf, allow them to settle in — and hang onto their toy or tablet — before they’re thrust into greetings from relatives that they haven’t seen in a year.  Also, don’t require your child to hug relatives if they don’t feel comfortable doing so. A high five, fist bump, or wave acknowledges the family member, too.

Build in time between visits. If one day is very active with lots of company or visiting, make sure the next day is restful and quiet, especially for kids with autism. “Their brains can get overwhelmed and cause autistic burnout, when they withdraw completely,” says Dr. Sorscher.

Picky eaters

Food is the love language in my family — and my child is very sensitive to textures and has a limited diet.

Loop in family members. “Tell the host and some guests in advance that your child has eating challenges, and you’re working on them,” says Dr. Thirkield. “Doing so will hopefully make them supporters and reduce the likelihood of insensitive, hurtful comments.” French warns that children, including nonverbal ones, are aware when relatives are talking about them, so shut down any conversation at the get-together about your child’s eating habits.

Bring your child’s food. A gracious host may offer to make something special for your picky eater (“No problem, I could bake a mac ‘n cheese!”), but feel free to turn down the offer if it won’t work (“Thank you! But he really only likes a certain brand, so if we could just use the microwave to heat up a dish I bring, I’d appreciate it!”) A bento-type box filled with finger foods — like crackers, cheese cubes, and grapes — work particularly well to bring to a guest’s house. If you live nearby, feeding picky eaters at home first is another kid-friendly holiday strategy. Consider it a win (and praise them) if they nibble on anything else, even if they didn’t like it. (“I’m proud that you tasted your aunt’s pumpkin bread, even though you didn’t like it this time.”)

Give kids a comfortable space. Being squished at a noisy Thanksgiving table makes some kids with challenges too uncomfortable to eat or engage in any way. Set up a kids’ table with fidget toys and favors. You could also consider bringing your child’s favorite plate and cup.

Sensory issues

I see kids dressed up in their matching holiday clothes, and I wish that could be us. My kids would never wear anything like that!

Choose a color scheme. “We did matching clothes for three years, and when that wasn’t working, we shifted to a red-and-green theme. It still looked festive, but each of the kids could select what was comfortable for them,” says Trautwein. If you celebrate Hanukkah, consider a combination of blue, white, and silver.

Focus on soft fabrics and tagless items. “That’s pretty much all my kids wear,” says French, who started her business Forever French Baby by making kids’ pajamas out of soft bamboo and Spandex when her daughter wouldn’t tolerate wearing any clothes.

Give kids a say. If your child is old enough, show them a few outfits online and ask them for their preference. Dr. Thirkield adds, “Finding the middle path in a way, with something that’s holiday-esque and that kids helped us pick out, is a great solution.”

Add a soft layer. For dress clothes that kids do like but aren’t the softest, add a T-shirt underlayer. “That’s been how we’ve been able to do costumes,” French adds. But try to avoid clothes that may make kids feel hot, which may further aggravate kids with sensory challenges and cause holiday stress. For instance, be satisfied if your child will wear a cute dress — and don’t push it by attempting the fancy coat. Leggings under a dress are a more comfortable alternative to tights or bare legs are fine in warmer climates. For boys, a bow tie may cause less sensory issues than a necktie.

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Traveling with kids

Most of our family and friends live out of town, so we’re going to be traveling a bunch this year. I’m worried it’s going to be a nightmare.

Drive when you can. For kids with challenges, particularly autism and sensory sensitivities, a 10-hour drive is usually better than a 90-minute plane ride — especially if the drive is broken up into two days, says Dr. Sorscher. “Kids with autism typically do surprisingly well in the car because they don’t mind boring, repetitive tasks,” she says. “Planes are more challenging because there’s a lot of waiting, transitioning, and unfamiliar noises.” If you do need to fly, look at these tips to make the airport a smoother experience.

Look for bonding moments. If you’re driving together for a long period, use it as an opportunity to create traditions, suggests Dr. Thirkield. Mutually agree on a car game to play before you leave. For instance, you could create a visual scavenger hunt game card (or find a printable online) with items like an inflatable snowman, bakery, car with antlers, and other holiday-themed objects you might encounter on the road.

Pack distractions and favorite snacks. “For each child, we would pack crayons, coloring books, mini action figures or dolls, and other small fun toys in a bucket that they could easily reach,” says Trautwein. It’s also fine to relax screen-time rules for these special occasions, assures Dr. Thirkield. While some kids may be happiest watching their favorite movie over and over, you can download something new for them to enjoy.

Extend bathroom breaks. Allow kids to run around a safe grassy area at rest stops to blow off some steam before the next leg of the journey.

Giving gifts

My child never has that jumping for joy, viral video reaction to gifts.

https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-24-ways-to-make-the-holidays-kid-friendly-3/

James Donaldson on Mental Health - Teens with supportive but firm parents have better mental health

By Eric Ralls

Parents do not just feed and clothe teenagers – they also set the emotional climate at home. A new study of 583 students in western Nepal links that climate to striking differences in depression, anxiety, stress, and self-esteem.

Globally, one in seven adolescents lives with a mental disorder, and suicide ranks among the leading causes of death for young people. 

The World Health Organization notes that adolescence is the phase of life between childhood and adulthood, from ages 10 to 19.

Parents shape teen mental health

Psychologists use the phrase parenting style, a consistent pattern of warmth and control adults show their children, to describe broad approaches to raising kids. 

Classic work organizes these approaches into three main styles that differ in how strict and how supportive parents are.

The work was led by Rabina Khadka, a public health lecturer at the Manmohan Memorial Institute of Health Sciences in Kathmandu (MMIHS).

Among the parenting styles, authoritative parenting is a mix of clear expectations and warm responsiveness to the child. This approach is often described as the most balanced. It gives teenagers both guidance and room to develop their own judgment.

“Authoritative parenting styles are associated with better mental health and self-esteem among adolescents,” stated Khadka. 

The team’s findings suggest that this blend of structure and support may help teens handle stress and setbacks more confidently.

Depression, stress, and self-esteem

The team carried out a cross-sectional study, a one-time survey of students at a single point in time in Bheemdatt Municipality. They asked teens about symptoms of depression, anxiety, stress, and their sense of self-worth.

About one-third of the adolescents screened positive for depression, and almost half showed signs of anxiety. Roughly one-quarter met the cutoffs for high stress, while most still reported relatively high self-esteem.

To understand these patterns, the researchers used a statistical method that estimates how factors relate to the odds of an outcome. 

The models accounted for many background factors, so the links between parenting style and mental health were unlikely to be accidental.

The same models showed that social context mattered a great deal. Youth who reported being bullied or feeling less close to friends and teachers faced significantly higher odds of psychological distress and lower self-esteem.

The role of predictable boundaries

The study also examined authoritarian parenting, a style that relies on strict rules, firm demands, and little discussion of the reasons behind them. 

Adolescents in these families were more likely to report symptoms of depression and tended to describe themselves in more negative emotional terms.

In contrast, permissive parenting – a style where parents are warm but allow freedom with few limits – was tied to elevated stress in Nepali teens. 

Without predictable boundaries, young people may feel unsupported when school pressure or social problems build up.

Parents strongly affect teen health

Self-esteem patterns added another twist. Teenagers who saw their parents as authoritative reported lower self-esteem.

Teens with authoritarian parents reported higher scores – challenging ideas about confidence and control.

Previous research has also found that parenting style and adolescent mental health are linked, though not always in the same way. 

A recent study of Malaysian pre-university students linked authoritarian parenting and fathers’ education to depression, anxiety, and stress.

Rethinking support for adolescents

Taken together, the Nepal findings highlight the importance of a supportive home environment, a family climate where adults notice changes, listen, and respond calmly. 

This echoes broader guidance from the World Health Organization, which stresses that home, school, and community relationships are central to adolescent mental health.

The results also point to the double burden carried by teenagers who face both unsupportive parenting and bullying at school. 

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Providing support for teens

When criticism or control follows a young person from home to the classroom or playground, opportunities to recover emotionally shrink.

Schools and local governments can respond by strengthening counseling services, enforcing anti-bullying rules, and inviting parents into conversations about mental health. 

Families, meanwhile, can practice simple habits such as regular check-in talks, shared activities, and clear but respectful rules.

Ultimately, the research suggests that how adults talk, listen, and set limits at home can shape whether adolescent distress becomes a lasting problem or remains manageable.

https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-teens-with-supportive-but-firm-parents-have-better-mental-health/

By Eric Ralls

Parents do not just feed and clothe teenagers – they also set the emotional climate at home. A new study of 583 students in western Nepal links that climate to striking differences in depression, anxiety, stress, and self-esteem.

Globally, one in seven adolescents lives with a mental disorder, and suicide ranks among the leading causes of death for young people. 

The World Health Organization notes that adolescence is the phase of life between childhood and adulthood, from ages 10 to 19.

Parents shape teen mental health

Psychologists use the phrase parenting style, a consistent pattern of warmth and control adults show their children, to describe broad approaches to raising kids. 

Classic work organizes these approaches into three main styles that differ in how strict and how supportive parents are.

The work was led by Rabina Khadka, a public health lecturer at the Manmohan Memorial Institute of Health Sciences in Kathmandu (MMIHS).

Among the parenting styles, authoritative parenting is a mix of clear expectations and warm responsiveness to the child. This approach is often described as the most balanced. It gives teenagers both guidance and room to develop their own judgment.

“Authoritative parenting styles are associated with better mental health and self-esteem among adolescents,” stated Khadka. 

The team’s findings suggest that this blend of structure and support may help teens handle stress and setbacks more confidently.

Depression, stress, and self-esteem

The team carried out a cross-sectional study, a one-time survey of students at a single point in time in Bheemdatt Municipality. They asked teens about symptoms of depression, anxiety, stress, and their sense of self-worth.

About one-third of the adolescents screened positive for depression, and almost half showed signs of anxiety. Roughly one-quarter met the cutoffs for high stress, while most still reported relatively high self-esteem.

To understand these patterns, the researchers used a statistical method that estimates how factors relate to the odds of an outcome. 

The models accounted for many background factors, so the links between parenting style and mental health were unlikely to be accidental.

The same models showed that social context mattered a great deal. Youth who reported being bullied or feeling less close to friends and teachers faced significantly higher odds of psychological distress and lower self-esteem.

The role of predictable boundaries

The study also examined authoritarian parenting, a style that relies on strict rules, firm demands, and little discussion of the reasons behind them. 

Adolescents in these families were more likely to report symptoms of depression and tended to describe themselves in more negative emotional terms.

In contrast, permissive parenting – a style where parents are warm but allow freedom with few limits – was tied to elevated stress in Nepali teens. 

Without predictable boundaries, young people may feel unsupported when school pressure or social problems build up.

Parents strongly affect teen health

Self-esteem patterns added another twist. Teenagers who saw their parents as authoritative reported lower self-esteem.

Teens with authoritarian parents reported higher scores – challenging ideas about confidence and control.

Previous research has also found that parenting style and adolescent mental health are linked, though not always in the same way. 

A recent study of Malaysian pre-university students linked authoritarian parenting and fathers’ education to depression, anxiety, and stress.

Rethinking support for adolescents

Taken together, the Nepal findings highlight the importance of a supportive home environment, a family climate where adults notice changes, listen, and respond calmly. 

This echoes broader guidance from the World Health Organization, which stresses that home, school, and community relationships are central to adolescent mental health.

The results also point to the double burden carried by teenagers who face both unsupportive parenting and bullying at school. 

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Providing support for teens

When criticism or control follows a young person from home to the classroom or playground, opportunities to recover emotionally shrink.

Schools and local governments can respond by strengthening counseling services, enforcing anti-bullying rules, and inviting parents into conversations about mental health. 

Families, meanwhile, can practice simple habits such as regular check-in talks, shared activities, and clear but respectful rules.

Ultimately, the research suggests that how adults talk, listen, and set limits at home can shape whether adolescent distress becomes a lasting problem or remains manageable. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16199

James Donaldson on Mental Health - Men's Mental Health: Why we must talk about men's mental health and suicide prevention

Mental health is still treated as a silent battle for many men. Breaking this silence is essential to prevent emotional distress and rising suicide cases.

Why we must talk about men’s mental health and suicide prevention

Smarica Pant

Mental health is a crucial part of overall well-being, yet it remains one of the most overlooked conversations, especially when it comes to men. From a young age, boys are often told to “stay strong,” “man up,” and “don’t cry,” conditioning them to hide their emotions rather than express them.

These expectations follow them into adulthood, where many men begin to believe that vulnerability is a weakness and that seeking help is a sign of failure. As a result, thousands silently carry the weight of stress, anxiety, loneliness, financial pressures, relationship issues, and unresolved trauma.

When these emotions remain unspoken, they can grow into serious mental health challenges, including depression, substance dependence, and, in severe cases, suicide.

Across India and in many parts of the world, there is a worrying rise in suicides among men, a reminder that the pressure to “be strong” is not a strength, but a silent crisis.

Explaining the pattern, Dr Poonam Santhosh, Consultant – Psychiatry, KMC Hospital, Mangalore, says men often reach out for help much later than women.

“Men’s mental health issues are ignored to the point that they seek help only when symptoms become severe. We see more cases of severe depression and severe anxiety in men, and completed suicides are also much higher in men,” she says.

Dr Santhosh adds that breaking stereotypes is essential.

“Society has built this idea that men must ‘man up’ or should not cry. Men themselves need to challenge this by talking openly about their feelings, seeking timely help, and reaching out when they are struggling,” she explains.

WHY MEN STRUGGLE TO TALK ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH

1. Social conditioning starts early

From childhood, many boys have been discouraged from showing sadness or fear. These beliefs become deep-rooted, making it harder for men to discuss emotional pain later in life.

2. Fear of judgment

Many men worry they will be judged as “weak” if they open up. This fear stops them from sharing feelings even with close friends or partners.

3. Limited emotional vocabulary

Because emotional expression is often discouraged, many men grow up without the tools to describe what they’re feeling. For them, irritation or anger becomes the easiest outlet—even when the root issue is stress or anxiety.

4. Lack of awareness

Men may ignore early signs of depression or burnout, assuming these are just “bad days” or temporary stress.

5. The provider's pressure

Financial stress, job insecurity, and societal expectations to be the “provider” add extra emotional weight.

THE RISING SUICIDE RISK AMONG MEN

Men account for a disproportionately high percentage of suicides globally. Studies show that men are less likely to seek therapy, delay medical help, and internalise stress, leading to a higher risk during emotional crises.

Factors include:

- Untreated depression
- Substance abuse
- Loneliness
- Relationship breakdowns
- Work pressure
- Lack of emotional support systems

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

The uncomfortable truth is simple: not talking about mental health is costing lives.

BREAKING THE SILENCE: WHAT NEEDS TO CHANGE

1. Normalising emotional conversations

Men need safe spaces at home, workplaces, and social groups where they can express feelings without mockery or judgment.

2. Encouraging therapy

Therapy should be viewed as a positive step toward well-being, not a last resort.

3. Educating families and schools

Children must learn that emotions are not signs of weakness. Changing early conditioning can prevent long-term harm.

4. Promoting mental health in workplaces

Employee assistance programs, stress-management sessions, and anonymous counselling can help men access support.

5. Supporting each other

A simple check-in, “How are you, really?” can sometimes change the course of someone's day.

The conversation around men’s mental health must shift from silence to understanding. It’s time to replace “stay strong” with “it’s okay to ask for help.”

When men open up, seek support, and allow themselves to be vulnerable, they not only protect their mental well-being but also create a healthier environment for their families and communities.

https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-mens-mental-health-why-we-must-talk-about-mens-mental-health-and-suicide-prevention/

Mental health is still treated as a silent battle for many men. Breaking this silence is essential to prevent emotional distress and rising suicide cases.

Why we must talk about men’s mental health and suicide prevention

Smarica Pant

Mental health is a crucial part of overall well-being, yet it remains one of the most overlooked conversations, especially when it comes to men. From a young age, boys are often told to “stay strong,” “man up,” and “don’t cry,” conditioning them to hide their emotions rather than express them.

These expectations follow them into adulthood, where many men begin to believe that vulnerability is a weakness and that seeking help is a sign of failure. As a result, thousands silently carry the weight of stress, anxiety, loneliness, financial pressures, relationship issues, and unresolved trauma.

When these emotions remain unspoken, they can grow into serious mental health challenges, including depression, substance dependence, and, in severe cases, suicide.

Across India and in many parts of the world, there is a worrying rise in suicides among men, a reminder that the pressure to “be strong” is not a strength, but a silent crisis.

Explaining the pattern, Dr Poonam Santhosh, Consultant – Psychiatry, KMC Hospital, Mangalore, says men often reach out for help much later than women.

“Men’s mental health issues are ignored to the point that they seek help only when symptoms become severe. We see more cases of severe depression and severe anxiety in men, and completed suicides are also much higher in men,” she says.

Dr Santhosh adds that breaking stereotypes is essential.

“Society has built this idea that men must ‘man up’ or should not cry. Men themselves need to challenge this by talking openly about their feelings, seeking timely help, and reaching out when they are struggling,” she explains.

WHY MEN STRUGGLE TO TALK ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH

1. Social conditioning starts early

From childhood, many boys have been discouraged from showing sadness or fear. These beliefs become deep-rooted, making it harder for men to discuss emotional pain later in life.

2. Fear of judgment

Many men worry they will be judged as “weak” if they open up. This fear stops them from sharing feelings even with close friends or partners.

3. Limited emotional vocabulary

Because emotional expression is often discouraged, many men grow up without the tools to describe what they’re feeling. For them, irritation or anger becomes the easiest outlet—even when the root issue is stress or anxiety.

4. Lack of awareness

Men may ignore early signs of depression or burnout, assuming these are just “bad days” or temporary stress.

5. The provider's pressure

Financial stress, job insecurity, and societal expectations to be the “provider” add extra emotional weight.

THE RISING SUICIDE RISK AMONG MEN

Men account for a disproportionately high percentage of suicides globally. Studies show that men are less likely to seek therapy, delay medical help, and internalise stress, leading to a higher risk during emotional crises.

Factors include:

- Untreated depression

- Substance abuse

- Loneliness

- Relationship breakdowns

- Work pressure

- Lack of emotional support systems

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

The uncomfortable truth is simple: not talking about mental health is costing lives.

BREAKING THE SILENCE: WHAT NEEDS TO CHANGE

1. Normalising emotional conversations

Men need safe spaces at home, workplaces, and social groups where they can express feelings without mockery or judgment.

2. Encouraging therapy

Therapy should be viewed as a positive step toward well-being, not a last resort.

3. Educating families and schools

Children must learn that emotions are not signs of weakness. Changing early conditioning can prevent long-term harm.

4. Promoting mental health in workplaces

Employee assistance programs, stress-management sessions, and anonymous counselling can help men access support.

5. Supporting each other

A simple check-in, “How are you, really?” can sometimes change the course of someone's day.

The conversation around men’s mental health must shift from silence to understanding. It’s time to replace “stay strong” with “it’s okay to ask for help.”

When men open up, seek support, and allow themselves to be vulnerable, they not only protect their mental well-being but also create a healthier environment for their families and communities. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16197

James Donaldson on Mental Health - Suicide: Stepping into uncomfortable spaces

Marc Palma looks into the largest self-described ‘right-to-die forum’, and considers what Psychologists should know.

Author's note: This is a descriptive history of a long-running self-described 'right-to-die' forum. It does not endorse the forum or its views; it omits operational details, links and methods; and includes help resources at the end.

Nobody likes to talk about suicide. It's hard, heavy, and often exhausting. We tend to change the subject and hope someone else will handle it. Avoidance, however, doesn't help. According to the latest World Health Organization estimate, someone dies by suicide about once every 40 seconds. That means around 13 people by the time you finish reading this article. Those losses are not individual statistics – they ripple through friends, family, and whole communities. They can never be undone.

Ignoring suicide, then, is something that we cannot continue to do. But how do we go about understanding it? Research and clinical interviews reveal a great deal, but only capture those who are willing to speak with a clinician. For many, especially now, the safer place to talk isn't seen to be a consultation room – it's the internet. 

There, much of the conversation takes place in semi-private corners: pseudonymous threads and niche forums that many clinicians never encounter. Many of these spaces frame suicide as a personal right, rather than stemming from mental torment where recovery is possible and desirable. Consequently, even when clinicians encounter these forums, they hesitate to engage with them in practice because of ethical concerns. 

In my view, understanding means stepping into uncomfortable places, including the digital forums where people gather in self-described 'right-to-die' communities. Ignoring these spaces, even when concerns are valid, not only limits our understanding of suicide but also risks doing a disservice to people there who might benefit from professional support. 

Therefore, to gain better insight into these understudied communities and how they function, I've spent the last 18 months doing research into the largest of those communities. Why are they growing in size? Why are people are turning to digital spaces to talk about suicide? What follows is a brief history of the community, intended to provide a better understanding of their beliefs, followed by key considerations for psychologists, researchers, and policymakers regarding these spaces.

Evolution and philosophy of the forum

The community's roots trace back to a subreddit created in March 2013. The community's founding creed indicated the following: that a right to die exists; that suicide should be discussable without censorship; and that, for some, suicide can appear to be the only logical conclusion. As the community grew, worries about 'normals', non-members who might try to persuade users away from the forum's prevailing views, began to fester; pressure from Reddit also began to build due to the content in the threads not aligning with the company's policies. Eventually, Reddit decided to ban the subreddit outright on 18 March 2018. That same day, an independent site under the same name as the subreddit was created, aiming to continue upholding the group's creed.

The independent site quickly surpassed the subreddit's size of 16,000 members and became the focal point of public scrutiny. Main criticisms of the site were around: 1. How the site allows members to discuss detailed 'methods' on how to carry out suicide, 2. How the site has no real checks to ensure minors aren't accessing the forum despite the rules stating that members must be over 18, and 3. How, even though the site claims to be pro-choice, talk can often skew so far into the negative that it can be viewed as more pro-suicide. As a result of these points, the independent site has weathered several high-profile government and media investigations since its formation, leading to temporary one-day closures and ownership transfers. Most recently, the site has been the target of the UK regulator Ofcom, which has opened an investigation. 

Through all this, however, the site has remained up and active, continuing to grow in membership size. As of the time of writing this article, the site has approximately 60,000 unique members and over 3,000,000 individual posts.

So what does the evolution of this specific community tell us about understanding suicide in less-visible online spaces? 

Reducing harm without amplifying defiance

First, outside pressure often influences where discussions occur more than whether they occur at all. Across bans, investigations, and policy shifts, the group moved and tightened access rather than disappearing, supporting the notion that a significant portion of individuals with suicidal thoughts need a space to discuss their feelings. Historically, these communities have persisted despite attempts to suppress them. In fact, scrutiny tends to harden public identity. In the historical record, external attention (bans, investigations, media coverage) simply reinforces an 'us vs. them' stance by users, something that is viewable all the way back to when the group was first forming. This may make engagement with professional mental health help harder, as an individual may feel like no-one but people on the forum understands them. 

This isn't to say that we shouldn't try to regulate these spaces through policy; rather, that policy needs to be tailored in ways that are effective and that acknowledge that there is a clear desire to talk about suicide in a way that is free from fears of judgement or repercussions. Many users report that they feel these spaces are the only place where they can share how they are truly feeling. The outright banning of spaces like this can therefore prove dangerous, as these members will feel like they have lost what might be their only coping mechanism. Investigating the creation of a safer online environment for sharing these thoughts could prove to be a worthwhile endeavor for those in policy and the mental health field, as the demand and apparent need for such spaces are clear.

Second, for individuals in the mental health field who interact with clients on a daily basis, understanding that these spaces exist and are widely accessible is also important. A practitioner may have a client who is engaging in these online communities without their knowledge, as they may not have realized the space existed in the first place. Asking a client who is thinking of suicide, especially one who seemingly uses the internet a lot, if they engage in online talks about their mental health (in a way that is non-revealing to the existence of these sites in the first place) could, as a result, be something beneficial for mental health providers to do. Asking this question to specific clients who are debating acting on suicidal thoughts is even more critical, as the site and ones like it could prove a significant risk in terms of increasing the risk of action due to them housing threads with specific methodology planning.

Third, there is a plethora of information on these sites that could prove beneficial for researchers. These forums have the potential to reveal the unfiltered thoughts and feelings of individuals who do not participate in research studies or in-person therapy. Proper ethical practices must be followed to ensure that the resulting research causes no harm; however, there is an opportunity to conduct critical research into an underreported and underrepresented, hard-to-reach group of the population.

Finally, the internet appears to be facilitating discussions based on personal autonomy that can lead to harmful behavior. Although the focus here is a suicide-discussion forum, many of the dynamics are familiar to clinicians who have tracked pro-ana communities: an emphasis on personal autonomy framed as a shield against 'outsider' judgement; migration patterns that follow moderation pressure rather than end participation; and in-group language that blurs 'support' and risk. Recognizing these shared features matters. It reinforces the idea that blanket suppression can strengthen identity and drive conversations into harder-to-reach spaces. Alternatively, calibrated, evidence-informed approaches – such as clear age-gating, active moderation that prioritizes distress-signaling over risk-amplifying content, and pathways to care that do not demand immediate disclosure – may reduce harm without amplifying defiance. 

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Creating safer alternatives

In conclusion, for policymakers leading the charge to regulate these sites, creating safer alternatives should be considered a high priority. For practitioners, being aware of the existence of these sites and listening to clients for the underlying narratives common to these spaces (autonomy, belonging, mistrust) or other general signs that an individual is using them is crucial to ensure the safety of clients. Lastly, for researchers, doing more work to understand how these environments shape user sentiment and overall how we discuss suicide in online spaces as a whole should be considered a top priority.

https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-suicide-stepping-into-uncomfortable-spaces/