Friday, August 14, 2026

James Donaldson on Mental Health - The complicated link between social media and adolescent mental health

James Donaldson on Mental Health - The complicated link between social media and adolescent mental health

By Sierra McDonald



Why does social media seem to both endanger and protect young people’s mental health? 


Growing research links excessive online use to addiction, cyberbullying and suicide risk among adolescents. However, those same digital platforms simultaneously provide connection, understanding and community support to many. 


As researchers continue to uncover these conflicting effects, it is clear that the relationship between social media use and suicide risk is not a simple one. Emerging research shows that the relationship between social media use and suicide ideation is correlational not causational. 


People need to stop blaming social media for teen’s poor mental health, as it is not directly correlated to suicidal thoughts; however, many patterns of use do coincide with higher risk. The issue is complex and evolving that demands our attention, exploration and evidence based reasoning.


TMH posted an anonymous survey to its Instagram story on Jan. 20, which received 60 responses. A junior survey respondent explains their experience with comparing themself with others on social media. 


“Just watching people’s stories and posts sometimes contributes to a feeling of loneliness and that I’m not experiencing college ‘the right way.’”


As a result of the digital age, young people often feel pressured to participate online in order to maintain friendships, express themselves or stay relevant within their peer networks. This pressure is often intensified by fear of missing out (FOMO), where the expectation to stay constantly updated and visible online highlights anxiety and reinforces feelings of exclusion. The constant connectivity can blur the line between genuine connection and performance, often leaving teenagers empowered, but more importantly, exposed and isolated. 


Marcia Gomez, professor of social media messaging and coordinator of social media internships at the University of Miami offers her thoughts on FOMO. 


“FOMO can be understood as a psychological response to constant exposure to curated online lives rather than a superficial social trend,” Gomez said. “The concern is less about social media itself and more about the intensity and comparison-driven nature of exposure, which can subtly shape emotional well-being over time.”


Many studies suggest that the way adolescents engage with social media matters more than the platforms themselves. They highlight how excessive engagement can foster addiction-like behaviors, expose young people to cyberbullying and intensify feelings of isolation, inadequacy and social comparison. In the most extreme cases, these online experiences correlate with self harm and suicide ideation. 


The data collected by TMH’s anonymous survey further reinforces the distinction between social media itself and how it is used. A majority of respondents reported spending several hours a day on social media platforms, with many acknowledging compulsive checking behaviors, pressure to post and concern over likes and comments. 


While many participants also reported positive outcomes such as staying connected with friends or finding community, negative experiences were just as prevalent.


Feelings of comparison, insecurity, loneliness and exposure to cyber bullying appeared repeatedly across responses, particularly among those with higher daily usage. Notably, approximately 70% of respondents out of 60 selected “strongly disagree” for the statement “social media is good for my mental health”. This indicates a clear majority perceived social media as having a negative impact on their mental well-being. 


An article published by Leonido Mendes and Marta Morgado found that “addiction to social media was a statistically significant predictor of suicidal ideation, after controlling for gender and physical activity.” 


While the study captures data from a single point in time, it reveals that it isn’t simply the time spent on social platforms that correlates with suicidal thoughts, but rather the addictive behaviors surrounding social media use. These addictive behaviors include compulsive checking of social media, interference with everyday tasks and dissociation from relationships and social encounters. 


One respondent from the survey, who identified herself as Elena, emphasized a negative experience with ‘doom scrolling’. 


“I spend hours scrolling and it messes with my attention span, consumes a lot of time and isn’t productive at all,” Elena said. 


Additional warning signs linked to online activity include cyberbullying and digital self harm. Most probably already know what cyberbullying is, but digital self harm refers to individuals posting or sharing negative content about oneself. Overall, the CDC’s national?scale data supports the conclusion that frequent social media engagement is associated with increased risk of suicidality among adolescents and helps researchers identify particularly vulnerable sub?populations.


Despite these findings, social media is not solely harmful, it has the ability to both harm and heal ultimately mirroring adolescents itself. It’s a developmental stage marked by both vulnerability, growth, and the formation of identity and belonging. 


#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.
  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy


Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson



Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog



To understand social media’s true relationship to adolescent mental health, it is crucial to examine not only its risks, but also its potential to serve as a lifeline. 


Researchers and mental health organizations increasingly emphasize that these digital spaces can be used as a tool to combat depression and suicide ideation. A 2023 psychological autopsy study by Elias Balt and colleagues in Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health underscores this dual nature of online engagement. 


The researchers examined the digital histories of teens who died by suicide, analyzing their social media activity, communication patterns and online communities. These findings revealed a complex dynamic of both harmful and protective factors. 


For many victims, cyberbullying, exposure to self-harm content and imitation behaviours were present. These are all clear indicators that social media amplifies vulnerability and contagion effects. 


However, other adolescent victims had participated in online support groups, expressed empathy for others and used their platforms to reach out for help. In several cases, peers within these digital spaces had even encouraged the individuals to seek counselling or talk to trusted adults. 


This highlights the fact that adolescents’ digital footprint encompasses both risks and protective influences, and cannot be attributed to just one cause. Researchers argue online behaviour often mirrors the complexities of offline life, reflecting both suffering, resilience, risk and recovery.  


After properly understanding the complex and sometimes contradictory relationship between social media and youth mental health, it is important to focus on the work that can be done to make digital engagement safer. 


UM Professor David Berry teaches a course on social media messaging and strategies. He argues that the evidence linking social media to negative mental health outcomes is now strong enough to warrant meaningful safeguards for young users. 


“I feel that the research is statistically significant enough; the impact is clear,” said Berry. “And we are at a point where social media should be treated with consideration as getting a driver’s license to drive a car, having a legal drinking age limit, and so on.” 


The APP’s framing of social media as a protective factor challenges the public opinion that frames these platforms as purely detrimental. Rather than telling teens to stay off of social media, the organization calls for digital education on its intentional use. 


They encourage parents, educators and health professionals to guide adolescents in appropriate online habits and foster healthy online connections. This shift is known as restriction to regulation as we must acknowledge that social media is an inseparable part of our modern society. Eliminating these platforms is not realistic or productive as we have seen several different platforms come and go over the years.


Instead, the goal should be to teach young users how to interact with digital platforms in ways that nurture self-expression, empathy and safety. Unfortunately, it is also vital to acknowledge that many children, particularly those who are neglected or lack attentive caregivers, can fall through the cracks, missing these protective interventions and remaining at heightened risk. This gap underscores the importance of community, education and mental health systems in providing the guidance and oversight that may be absent at home. 


When looked at together, these findings position social media as both a potential risk factor and site of opportunity. This underscores the need for balanced approaches that acknowledge its dangers while harnessing its capacity to support youth well-being. 


https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-the-complicated-link-between-social-media-and-adolescent-mental-health/


James Donaldson on Mental Health - The complicated link between social media and adolescent mental health
By Sierra McDonald

Why does social media seem to both endanger and protect young people’s mental health? 

Growing research links excessive online use to addiction, cyberbullying and suicide risk among adolescents. However, those same digital platforms simultaneously provide connection, understanding and community support to many. 

As researchers continue to uncover these conflicting effects, it is clear that the relationship between social media use and suicide risk is not a simple one. Emerging research shows that the relationship between social media use and suicide ideation is correlational not causational. 

People need to stop blaming social media for teen’s poor mental health, as it is not directly correlated to suicidal thoughts; however, many patterns of use do coincide with higher risk. The issue is complex and evolving that demands our attention, exploration and evidence based reasoning.

TMH posted an anonymous survey to its Instagram story on Jan. 20, which received 60 responses. A junior survey respondent explains their experience with comparing themself with others on social media. 

“Just watching people’s stories and posts sometimes contributes to a feeling of loneliness and that I’m not experiencing college ‘the right way.’”

As a result of the digital age, young people often feel pressured to participate online in order to maintain friendships, express themselves or stay relevant within their peer networks. This pressure is often intensified by fear of missing out (FOMO), where the expectation to stay constantly updated and visible online highlights anxiety and reinforces feelings of exclusion. The constant connectivity can blur the line between genuine connection and performance, often leaving teenagers empowered, but more importantly, exposed and isolated. 

Marcia Gomez, professor of social media messaging and coordinator of social media internships at the University of Miami offers her thoughts on FOMO. 

“FOMO can be understood as a psychological response to constant exposure to curated online lives rather than a superficial social trend,” Gomez said. “The concern is less about social media itself and more about the intensity and comparison-driven nature of exposure, which can subtly shape emotional well-being over time.”

Many studies suggest that the way adolescents engage with social media matters more than the platforms themselves. They highlight how excessive engagement can foster addiction-like behaviors, expose young people to cyberbullying and intensify feelings of isolation, inadequacy and social comparison. In the most extreme cases, these online experiences correlate with self harm and suicide ideation. 

The data collected by TMH’s anonymous survey further reinforces the distinction between social media itself and how it is used. A majority of respondents reported spending several hours a day on social media platforms, with many acknowledging compulsive checking behaviors, pressure to post and concern over likes and comments. 

While many participants also reported positive outcomes such as staying connected with friends or finding community, negative experiences were just as prevalent.

Feelings of comparison, insecurity, loneliness and exposure to cyber bullying appeared repeatedly across responses, particularly among those with higher daily usage. Notably, approximately 70% of respondents out of 60 selected “strongly disagree” for the statement “social media is good for my mental health”. This indicates a clear majority perceived social media as having a negative impact on their mental well-being. 

An article published by Leonido Mendes and Marta Morgado found that “addiction to social media was a statistically significant predictor of suicidal ideation, after controlling for gender and physical activity.” 

While the study captures data from a single point in time, it reveals that it isn’t simply the time spent on social platforms that correlates with suicidal thoughts, but rather the addictive behaviors surrounding social media use. These addictive behaviors include compulsive checking of social media, interference with everyday tasks and dissociation from relationships and social encounters. 

One respondent from the survey, who identified herself as Elena, emphasized a negative experience with ‘doom scrolling’. 

“I spend hours scrolling and it messes with my attention span, consumes a lot of time and isn’t productive at all,” Elena said. 

Additional warning signs linked to online activity include cyberbullying and digital self harm. Most probably already know what cyberbullying is, but digital self harm refers to individuals posting or sharing negative content about oneself. Overall, the CDC’s national?scale data supports the conclusion that frequent social media engagement is associated with increased risk of suicidality among adolescents and helps researchers identify particularly vulnerable sub?populations.

Despite these findings, social media is not solely harmful, it has the ability to both harm and heal ultimately mirroring adolescents itself. It’s a developmental stage marked by both vulnerability, growth, and the formation of identity and belonging. 

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

To understand social media’s true relationship to adolescent mental health, it is crucial to examine not only its risks, but also its potential to serve as a lifeline. 

Researchers and mental health organizations increasingly emphasize that these digital spaces can be used as a tool to combat depression and suicide ideation. A 2023 psychological autopsy study by Elias Balt and colleagues in Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health underscores this dual nature of online engagement. 

The researchers examined the digital histories of teens who died by suicide, analyzing their social media activity, communication patterns and online communities. These findings revealed a complex dynamic of both harmful and protective factors. 

For many victims, cyberbullying, exposure to self-harm content and imitation behaviours were present. These are all clear indicators that social media amplifies vulnerability and contagion effects. 

However, other adolescent victims had participated in online support groups, expressed empathy for others and used their platforms to reach out for help. In several cases, peers within these digital spaces had even encouraged the individuals to seek counselling or talk to trusted adults. 

This highlights the fact that adolescents’ digital footprint encompasses both risks and protective influences, and cannot be attributed to just one cause. Researchers argue online behaviour often mirrors the complexities of offline life, reflecting both suffering, resilience, risk and recovery.  

After properly understanding the complex and sometimes contradictory relationship between social media and youth mental health, it is important to focus on the work that can be done to make digital engagement safer. 

UM Professor David Berry teaches a course on social media messaging and strategies. He argues that the evidence linking social media to negative mental health outcomes is now strong enough to warrant meaningful safeguards for young users. 

“I feel that the research is statistically significant enough; the impact is clear,” said Berry. “And we are at a point where social media should be treated with consideration as getting a driver’s license to drive a car, having a legal drinking age limit, and so on.” 

The APP’s framing of social media as a protective factor challenges the public opinion that frames these platforms as purely detrimental. Rather than telling teens to stay off of social media, the organization calls for digital education on its intentional use. 

They encourage parents, educators and health professionals to guide adolescents in appropriate online habits and foster healthy online connections. This shift is known as restriction to regulation as we must acknowledge that social media is an inseparable part of our modern society. Eliminating these platforms is not realistic or productive as we have seen several different platforms come and go over the years.

Instead, the goal should be to teach young users how to interact with digital platforms in ways that nurture self-expression, empathy and safety. Unfortunately, it is also vital to acknowledge that many children, particularly those who are neglected or lack attentive caregivers, can fall through the cracks, missing these protective interventions and remaining at heightened risk. This gap underscores the importance of community, education and mental health systems in providing the guidance and oversight that may be absent at home. 

When looked at together, these findings position social media as both a potential risk factor and site of opportunity. This underscores the need for balanced approaches that acknowledge its dangers while harnessing its capacity to support youth well-being.  https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16509

Thursday, August 13, 2026

James Donaldson on Mental Health - 'We must shine a light on issue of male suicide'

James Donaldson on Mental Health - 'We must shine a light on issue of male suicide'
James Not Alone T-Shirt

By Angela Ferguson


A man who survived a suicide attempt is organising an art installation featuring 4,300 lights - one for every man who has taken his own life in the UK in one year.


Joe Jones, from Liverpool, said he decided to organise the display at the Isla Gladstone Conservatory in Stanley Park in a bid to highlight the "invisible issue" of men's mental health.


The 34-year-old father-of-two said he wanted more to be done to support those who are struggling.


"Each light represents a life lost to suicide in England in 2024 - that equates to 12 men every single day, one man every two hours," he said.


Jones set up Your Light Matters UK in November after coming out of hospital.


His aim was to create something visual and visceral to highlight the lives lost in 2024. The installation is due to be launched on 13 March.


"It is a moment designed to stop people in their tracks and make an invisible crisis impossible to ignore," he said.


#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.
  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy


Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson



Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog


'Feel the weight'


An installation was a better way to deliver his message than something written because "when you see it it hits you harder", Jones said.


He wants people to be "emotionally attached" to The Field of 4,300 Lights, which will also feature a beam going up into the sky.


"When people walk into this field of light, they will not see statistics they will feel the weight of what those numbers represent," he said.


Jones said he was grateful to have been approached by the owner of the Isla Gladstone, Gemma McGowan, with the offer of using the venue free of charge.


Other organisations and charities including Andy's Man Club, a mental health support group for men, and Alfie's Squad, which supports young people impacted by suicide, would also be at the launch event, he said.


Jones said he hoped the installation could move around the country and wanted more to be done to widely promote avenues of support for people struggling with their mental health, such as advertising on hoardings and on TV.


James Not Alone T-Shirt https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-we-must-shine-a-light-on-issue-of-male-suicide/


James Donaldson on Mental Health - 'We must shine a light on issue of male suicide'
By Angela Ferguson

A man who survived a suicide attempt is organising an art installation featuring 4,300 lights - one for every man who has taken his own life in the UK in one year.

Joe Jones, from Liverpool, said he decided to organise the display at the Isla Gladstone Conservatory in Stanley Park in a bid to highlight the "invisible issue" of men's mental health.

The 34-year-old father-of-two said he wanted more to be done to support those who are struggling.

"Each light represents a life lost to suicide in England in 2024 - that equates to 12 men every single day, one man every two hours," he said.

Jones set up Your Light Matters UK in November after coming out of hospital.

His aim was to create something visual and visceral to highlight the lives lost in 2024. The installation is due to be launched on 13 March.

"It is a moment designed to stop people in their tracks and make an invisible crisis impossible to ignore," he said.

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

'Feel the weight'

An installation was a better way to deliver his message than something written because "when you see it it hits you harder", Jones said.

He wants people to be "emotionally attached" to The Field of 4,300 Lights, which will also feature a beam going up into the sky.

"When people walk into this field of light, they will not see statistics they will feel the weight of what those numbers represent," he said.

Jones said he was grateful to have been approached by the owner of the Isla Gladstone, Gemma McGowan, with the offer of using the venue free of charge.

Other organisations and charities including Andy's Man Club, a mental health support group for men, and Alfie's Squad, which supports young people impacted by suicide, would also be at the launch event, he said.

Jones said he hoped the installation could move around the country and wanted more to be done to widely promote avenues of support for people struggling with their mental health, such as advertising on hoardings and on TV. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16507

Wednesday, August 12, 2026



James Donaldson on Mental Health - How to Talk to Your Teen About Substance Use
Research shows that clear rules help keep kids safe

Teens and drugs

Writer: Rae Jacobson, MS

What You'll Learn

- Why is it important to talk to teens about substance use?

- What are some tips for having the conversation?

- How can parents help keep kids safe?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Plan to have the talk

- Spell out the rules

- Explain your reasons

- Obey the golden rule

- Let them speak

- The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma

- Conditional amnesty

- An ongoing conversation

Talking to teenagers about drugs and alcohol is important. Teens need structure to stay safe. Having clear rules about drugs and alcohol can help. You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules, even if they’re broken, are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t.

But it can be hard to know what to say. Don’t surprise kids with a big talk. Instead, let your child know you want have a conversation about drinking and drugs. Be clear about rules and specific about what will happen if kids break them. Kids do best when they know what to expect. And, if your child is pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, clear rules make it easier for them to say no. “I can’t, my parents would ground me for a week!” Speak to your child the way you’d like to be spoken to. Showing respect sends the message that you trust them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own, too.

Help your child understand why drinking or drug use is dangerous and how making poor choices can impact their life. Be honest and reasonable. Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling.

Let them know that your goal is to help them stay safe. Make sure your child knows that they can call you for help in any situation, no matter what.

Adolescence is a tricky time. Teenagers are just beginning to establish their identities and this often means testing the limits of parental controls. When it comes to drugs and alcohol, pushing the boundaries can lead to dangerous territory.

Setting clear rules about substance use helps give teens the structure they need to stay safe. Let’s be realistic: You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t. Even when the rules are broken, teens whose parents have clearly outlined what is and isn’t acceptable are less likely to run to extremes and more likely to make safer choices.

So you need to have the talk, but for a lot of parents initiating a potentially difficult conversation is daunting. A few guidelines can help get the ball rolling and make for a smoother, more productive experience for all.

Plan to have the talk

Springing a serious conversation on your teenager can make them feel ambushed and defensive. Give them a heads up beforehand and make sure to be clear about what the conversation will entail, so everyone can be on the same page. “Tomorrow night let’s have a talk about drinking and drugs. You’re not in trouble. I just want to talk about where we stand and hear any concerns you might be having.”

Spell out the rules

Clearly spell out your rules and the specific consequences of breaking them. Avoiding ambiguity lets your teenager know where you stand, and research shows that kids tend to be safer when parents set limits. And for kids who are being pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, it can make it easier for them if they know they can use their parents as an excuse for saying no.

Explain your reasons

Be very clear about your reasons for prohibiting substance use. Teenagers are often ordered to do things without being given a clear reason why and by explaining yourself you’re inviting them to have a more open, adult conversation.

The potential consequences of drinking and using drugs are real. Any kind of experimentation is illegal when you’re a teenager, and it’s dangerous.

Be honest and rational. Obviously, some illegal substances are more dangerous than others. Heroin is more perilous than pot. But any substance can be harmful: One beer is intoxicating, but 10 beers could be deadly.

And any substance use impairs judgment and kids are more likely to find themselves in problematic and potentially dangerous situations like driving drunk or having unwanted or risky sexual encounters. It can affect them in school, too. If they get caught it could go on their record — something they won’t want when they’re applying to colleges — and if they play sports, they could be cut from the team.

Obey the golden rule

Speak to your kids the way you’d like to be spoken to. Teenagers are acutely sensitive to condescension, and it’s important to remember that at the end of the day, they are the ones who will make the final decisions. Treat them like the adults you want them to become. By showing respect you’re modeling good behavior and letting them know you expect them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own as well.

Let them speak

Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling. Opening an equal, active dialogue will increase the chances that your teen will feel comfortable being honest with you in the future.

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma

Parents sometimes feel hypocritical hiding their own experiences. If your daughter asks if you’ve ever tried drugs, you can choose to keep your experiences private (not everything in your history needs to be available to your kids) or to share them, but don’t reminisce or otherwise glamorize your experiences. You can also explain that as a parent, it’s your job to help them avoid things they will regret, and substance use definitely increases the chances of doing something you will regret.

Conditional amnesty

What we want, first and foremost, is for kids to be safe. Being open and honest with your kids about drugs encourages them to reciprocate. One way to create safeguards for your teen is to have an “amnesty policy.”

In an amnesty situation, your child can call and ask for help without incurring the regular repercussions they might have if they tried to hide their behavior. Amnesty policies keep kids safe and encourage them to make appropriate choices without letting them off the hook.

For example: If your child (or their designated driver) is drunk at a party and they want to leave, they can call you and ask for a ride or cab fare instead of putting themselves at risk. They’d then be allowed to come home and go to bed without yelling or grounding. In the morning, you and them could have a talk about their drinking and safety.

An ongoing conversation

Talking to your teen about substance abuse should be a process, not a single event. Risk factors for substance use can change and multiply as teenagers weather the trials and pressures of adolescence. Keep an eye out for changes in your child’s mood and demeanor, shifting peer groups, and other signs that it might be time to check in about their safety and your expectations.

Make sure they know your conversation is an open-ended one and that it’s a two-way street — “I’m going to be checking in with you about this sometimes, and if you have any questions or concerns, you can always ask me, too.” Keeping the lines of communication open will help you and your teenager feel engaged and safe during a potentially turbulent time.

Teens and drugs https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16504


James Donaldson on Mental Health - How to Talk to Your Teen About Substance Use
Research shows that clear rules help keep kids safe

Teens and drugs

Writer: Rae Jacobson, MS

What You'll Learn

- Why is it important to talk to teens about substance use?

- What are some tips for having the conversation?

- How can parents help keep kids safe?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Plan to have the talk

- Spell out the rules

- Explain your reasons

- Obey the golden rule

- Let them speak

- The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma

- Conditional amnesty

- An ongoing conversation

Talking to teenagers about drugs and alcohol is important. Teens need structure to stay safe. Having clear rules about drugs and alcohol can help. You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules, even if they’re broken, are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t.

But it can be hard to know what to say. Don’t surprise kids with a big talk. Instead, let your child know you want have a conversation about drinking and drugs. Be clear about rules and specific about what will happen if kids break them. Kids do best when they know what to expect. And, if your child is pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, clear rules make it easier for them to say no. “I can’t, my parents would ground me for a week!” Speak to your child the way you’d like to be spoken to. Showing respect sends the message that you trust them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own, too.

Help your child understand why drinking or drug use is dangerous and how making poor choices can impact their life. Be honest and reasonable. Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling.

Let them know that your goal is to help them stay safe. Make sure your child knows that they can call you for help in any situation, no matter what.

Adolescence is a tricky time. Teenagers are just beginning to establish their identities and this often means testing the limits of parental controls. When it comes to drugs and alcohol, pushing the boundaries can lead to dangerous territory.

Setting clear rules about substance use helps give teens the structure they need to stay safe. Let’s be realistic: You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t. Even when the rules are broken, teens whose parents have clearly outlined what is and isn’t acceptable are less likely to run to extremes and more likely to make safer choices.

So you need to have the talk, but for a lot of parents initiating a potentially difficult conversation is daunting. A few guidelines can help get the ball rolling and make for a smoother, more productive experience for all.

Plan to have the talk

Springing a serious conversation on your teenager can make them feel ambushed and defensive. Give them a heads up beforehand and make sure to be clear about what the conversation will entail, so everyone can be on the same page. “Tomorrow night let’s have a talk about drinking and drugs. You’re not in trouble. I just want to talk about where we stand and hear any concerns you might be having.”

Spell out the rules

Clearly spell out your rules and the specific consequences of breaking them. Avoiding ambiguity lets your teenager know where you stand, and research shows that kids tend to be safer when parents set limits. And for kids who are being pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, it can make it easier for them if they know they can use their parents as an excuse for saying no.

Explain your reasons

Be very clear about your reasons for prohibiting substance use. Teenagers are often ordered to do things without being given a clear reason why and by explaining yourself you’re inviting them to have a more open, adult conversation.

The potential consequences of drinking and using drugs are real. Any kind of experimentation is illegal when you’re a teenager, and it’s dangerous.

Be honest and rational. Obviously, some illegal substances are more dangerous than others. Heroin is more perilous than pot. But any substance can be harmful: One beer is intoxicating, but 10 beers could be deadly.

And any substance use impairs judgment and kids are more likely to find themselves in problematic and potentially dangerous situations like driving drunk or having unwanted or risky sexual encounters. It can affect them in school, too. If they get caught it could go on their record — something they won’t want when they’re applying to colleges — and if they play sports, they could be cut from the team.

Obey the golden rule

Speak to your kids the way you’d like to be spoken to. Teenagers are acutely sensitive to condescension, and it’s important to remember that at the end of the day, they are the ones who will make the final decisions. Treat them like the adults you want them to become. By showing respect you’re modeling good behavior and letting them know you expect them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own as well.

Let them speak

Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling. Opening an equal, active dialogue will increase the chances that your teen will feel comfortable being honest with you in the future.

#James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma

Parents sometimes feel hypocritical hiding their own experiences. If your daughter asks if you’ve ever tried drugs, you can choose to keep your experiences private (not everything in your history needs to be available to your kids) or to share them, but don’t reminisce or otherwise glamorize your experiences. You can also explain that as a parent, it’s your job to help them avoid things they will regret, and substance use definitely increases the chances of doing something you will regret.

Conditional amnesty

What we want, first and foremost, is for kids to be safe. Being open and honest with your kids about drugs encourages them to reciprocate. One way to create safeguards for your teen is to have an “amnesty policy.”

In an amnesty situation, your child can call and ask for help without incurring the regular repercussions they might have if they tried to hide their behavior. Amnesty policies keep kids safe and encourage them to make appropriate choices without letting them off the hook.

For example: If your child (or their designated driver) is drunk at a party and they want to leave, they can call you and ask for a ride or cab fare instead of putting themselves at risk. They’d then be allowed to come home and go to bed without yelling or grounding. In the morning, you and them could have a talk about their drinking and safety.

An ongoing conversation

Talking to your teen about substance abuse should be a process, not a single event. Risk factors for substance use can change and multiply as teenagers weather the trials and pressures of adolescence. Keep an eye out for changes in your child’s mood and demeanor, shifting peer groups, and other signs that it might be time to check in about their safety and your expectations.

Make sure they know your conversation is an open-ended one and that it’s a two-way street — “I’m going to be checking in with you about this sometimes, and if you have any questions or concerns, you can always ask me, too.” Keeping the lines of communication open will help you and your teenager feel engaged and safe during a potentially turbulent time.

Teens and drugs https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16504

James Donaldson on Mental Health - How to Talk to Your Teen About Substance Use

James Donaldson on Mental Health - How to Talk to Your Teen About Substance Use

Research shows that clear rules help keep kids safe


photo of man smoking bluntTeens and drugs

Writer: Rae Jacobson, MS


What You'll Learn


- Why is it important to talk to teens about substance use?
- What are some tips for having the conversation?
- How can parents help keep kids safe?
- Quick Read
- Full Article
- Plan to have the talk
- Spell out the rules
- Explain your reasons
- Obey the golden rule
- Let them speak
- The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma
- Conditional amnesty
- An ongoing conversation

Talking to teenagers about drugs and alcohol is important. Teens need structure to stay safe. Having clear rules about drugs and alcohol can help. You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules, even if they’re broken, are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t.


But it can be hard to know what to say. Don’t surprise kids with a big talk. Instead, let your child know you want have a conversation about drinking and drugs. Be clear about rules and specific about what will happen if kids break them. Kids do best when they know what to expect. And, if your child is pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, clear rules make it easier for them to say no. “I can’t, my parents would ground me for a week!” Speak to your child the way you’d like to be spoken to. Showing respect sends the message that you trust them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own, too.


Help your child understand why drinking or drug use is dangerous and how making poor choices can impact their life. Be honest and reasonable. Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling.


Let them know that your goal is to help them stay safe. Make sure your child knows that they can call you for help in any situation, no matter what.


Adolescence is a tricky time. Teenagers are just beginning to establish their identities and this often means testing the limits of parental controls. When it comes to drugs and alcohol, pushing the boundaries can lead to dangerous territory.


Setting clear rules about substance use helps give teens the structure they need to stay safe. Let’s be realistic: You can’t guarantee that your rules won’t be broken. But research shows that kids who have clear rules are less likely to get into serious trouble than kids who don’t. Even when the rules are broken, teens whose parents have clearly outlined what is and isn’t acceptable are less likely to run to extremes and more likely to make safer choices.


So you need to have the talk, but for a lot of parents initiating a potentially difficult conversation is daunting. A few guidelines can help get the ball rolling and make for a smoother, more productive experience for all.


Plan to have the talk


Springing a serious conversation on your teenager can make them feel ambushed and defensive. Give them a heads up beforehand and make sure to be clear about what the conversation will entail, so everyone can be on the same page. “Tomorrow night let’s have a talk about drinking and drugs. You’re not in trouble. I just want to talk about where we stand and hear any concerns you might be having.”


Spell out the rules


Clearly spell out your rules and the specific consequences of breaking them. Avoiding ambiguity lets your teenager know where you stand, and research shows that kids tend to be safer when parents set limits. And for kids who are being pressured to do something they aren’t comfortable with, it can make it easier for them if they know they can use their parents as an excuse for saying no.


Explain your reasons


Be very clear about your reasons for prohibiting substance use. Teenagers are often ordered to do things without being given a clear reason why and by explaining yourself you’re inviting them to have a more open, adult conversation.


The potential consequences of drinking and using drugs are real. Any kind of experimentation is illegal when you’re a teenager, and it’s dangerous.


Be honest and rational. Obviously, some illegal substances are more dangerous than others. Heroin is more perilous than pot. But any substance can be harmful: One beer is intoxicating, but 10 beers could be deadly.


And any substance use impairs judgment and kids are more likely to find themselves in problematic and potentially dangerous situations like driving drunk or having unwanted or risky sexual encounters. It can affect them in school, too. If they get caught it could go on their record — something they won’t want when they’re applying to colleges — and if they play sports, they could be cut from the team.


Obey the golden rule


Speak to your kids the way you’d like to be spoken to. Teenagers are acutely sensitive to condescension, and it’s important to remember that at the end of the day, they are the ones who will make the final decisions. Treat them like the adults you want them to become. By showing respect you’re modeling good behavior and letting them know you expect them to act responsibly, not just for your sake, but for their own as well.


Let them speak


Give kids a chance to express their concerns and feelings. They may have been hoping for a chance to ask questions or check in about something troubling. Opening an equal, active dialogue will increase the chances that your teen will feel comfortable being honest with you in the future.


#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.
  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy


Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson



Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog



The ‘I learned it from you, Dad,’ dilemma


Parents sometimes feel hypocritical hiding their own experiences. If your daughter asks if you’ve ever tried drugs, you can choose to keep your experiences private (not everything in your history needs to be available to your kids) or to share them, but don’t reminisce or otherwise glamorize your experiences. You can also explain that as a parent, it’s your job to help them avoid things they will regret, and substance use definitely increases the chances of doing something you will regret.


Conditional amnesty


What we want, first and foremost, is for kids to be safe. Being open and honest with your kids about drugs encourages them to reciprocate. One way to create safeguards for your teen is to have an “amnesty policy.”


In an amnesty situation, your child can call and ask for help without incurring the regular repercussions they might have if they tried to hide their behavior. Amnesty policies keep kids safe and encourage them to make appropriate choices without letting them off the hook.


For example: If your child (or their designated driver) is drunk at a party and they want to leave, they can call you and ask for a ride or cab fare instead of putting themselves at risk. They’d then be allowed to come home and go to bed without yelling or grounding. In the morning, you and them could have a talk about their drinking and safety.


An ongoing conversation


Talking to your teen about substance abuse should be a process, not a single event. Risk factors for substance use can change and multiply as teenagers weather the trials and pressures of adolescence. Keep an eye out for changes in your child’s mood and demeanor, shifting peer groups, and other signs that it might be time to check in about their safety and your expectations.


Make sure they know your conversation is an open-ended one and that it’s a two-way street — “I’m going to be checking in with you about this sometimes, and if you have any questions or concerns, you can always ask me, too.” Keeping the lines of communication open will help you and your teenager feel engaged and safe during a potentially turbulent time.


photo of man smoking bluntTeens and drugs https://standingabovethecrowd.com/james-donaldson-on-mental-health-how-to-talk-to-your-teen-about-substance-use/