An aunt and her niece share their stories, their paths to healing, and their mission to help fellow survivors

By Katie Hurley and Dorrit Corwin

The Day It Happened

Katie, age 51

I was 23 years old and one day from completing the first year of my master’s in social work in Philadelphia. As I drove along the Schuylkill Expressway to meet a friend for dinner, the incessant beeping of my pager (did I mention it was 1998?) made me smile. It was my grandmother’s number on the tiny screen. Did Nana know how to page people? And how did she even know my number?

When I arrived at my friend’s house, I called her back.

“Katie?” said my mother’s voice. “You have to be strong right now. Dad died at work today.”

It was the only word that came to mind: “What?”

I remember every detail, the way we do in such moments: how the giant cordless phone rested between my ear and shoulder, the sound of Wheel of Fortune in the background. I sat on the edge of the sofa. A fly circled above me, making a low humming sound.

“What happened?” Two more words.

“We really don’t know. Maybe his heart. They’ll do an autopsy.”

We don’t know? People usually know, don’t they? Would knowing help?

I just talked to him. Five words took up residence in my brain as I blazed up I-95 en route to my childhood home. I remember none of that drive apart from those words. I pulled into the driveway to find more questions, and no answers.

For months, we dodged questions about the cause of death and hinted to each other that maybe it was his heart after all. Perhaps there was some truth in that, though not the scientific kind. Not the biological kind.

His heart wasn’t in it anymore. That was the closest we could come to saying suicide at a time when it was just not a word people said.

Dorrit, age 24

I was 21 and a junior in college, navigating the ambiguity of falling in love for the first time. Jameson and I had known each other since freshman year and had been seeing each other on and off for almost that long. He worked hard on improving his mental health, but dark thoughts made committing to a relationship difficult for him, he told me.

It was 2022, the summer before what would have been our senior year—if neither of us had taken time off during the pandemic. He seemed happy about returning to school, had genuine hopes for pursuing his many passions, and I felt his love for me more than ever. Still, he was never, it seemed, able to fully emerge from his depressive fog.

Mostly, but not completely.

Two days after we’d taken the train to Boston to see a concert, I was awoken by loud voices outside the house on College Hill where I lived. I opened the back door. Eight police officers stood there. They did not ask if I wanted to sit down. One of them asked if I was in a relationship with Jameson.

“Yes,” I said.

The cop told me that Jameson died early that morning.

Only seconds went by before they began questioning me:

“When was the last time you saw him?”

“Was he here with you at your house last night?”

“Was he acting weird?”

I could form neither sentences nor even words. All I could do was wail.

Katie

Courtesy of Hurley

Katie (Godbout) Hurley and her father, Jim GodboutCourtesy of Hurley

My father was the quintessential “good guy.” Friends and neighbors flocked to him when he entered a room, hungry for stories featuring characters that couldn’t possibly be real but hanging on his every word just in case. He knew to hold the punchline until his audience was rapt with anticipation, dropping a line to cue the raucous laughter at just the right moment. His college stories were the best, though I never knew if they were entirely true, like the time he allegedly rigged a toilet to deliver some kind of spiked purple punch when the handle was pressed and placed it on the front lawn for a summer party. He was generous with his time and friendship, and he was beloved in our community because of it.

I was the quiet child, the one who needed cajoling to go to a party or step even an inch outside my comfort zone. I couldn’t fathom what kind of a personality overhaul might be required to be more like him, so I studied him, practicing with my stuffed animals behind the safety of my locked bedroom door.

When my mom sat me and my three siblings down on her bedroom floor to tell us the results of the autopsy, I was stunned. For a moment, anyway. By age 23 I had battled my own demons enough to know that what we choose to show the world isn’t always how we feel inside of our own brains and hearts, so I moved quickly from shock to what I can only call despair. There I was, studying clinical social work, years after surviving my own flirtation with suicidal thoughts. How could I have missed the red flags?

Dorrit

When I first became close with Jameson in 2019, my mom urged me to be vigilant about checking in on him. I was hesitant to be overbearing. I had a huge crush on him and was intimidated by his striking good looks and the way he seemed to carry himself so confidently. I liked him even more when his confident facade came down, but I wasn’t expecting it to reveal such deep insecurity. The more suicide survivors I meet, the more I hear the same type of story: It’s often the people who appear the most perfect, happy, and confident who are fighting the most vicious inner demons.

The flip side of being raised by a suicide survivor is that my mother’s trauma afforded me the confidence to assume that I was equipped to help Jameson. I didn’t flinch when he told me about previous suicide attempts or childhood trauma. I knew him well for three years, yet there was so much more going on in his head than I could understand—waves crashing together and thrashing him below the surface, and sometimes all I could do was hold his hand and hope he made it to shore.

It’s often the people who appear the most perfect, happy, and confident who are fighting the most vicious inner demons.

For years he told me he was in no mental space to start dating someone, but that summer he seemed like the best version of himself. He was teaching himself music production, learning Japanese, and taking computer science and AI courses he found online.

I’ll never forget sitting with him on the rug of my childhood bedroom as he explained that while he’d spent lots of time contemplating ending his life, he’d come to the conclusion that he was done thinking about suicide ever again. His tone was serious, yet calm, as he gazed at me warmly through his oversize wire-rimmed glasses.

I believed him. More important, I could tell he believed himself.

How did everything fall apart so quickly?

Picking Up the Pieces

Katie

In the weeks and months that followed my father’s death, we began to piece things together. Financial distress, kept hidden even from my mother, was likely a contributing factor. But there were the memories of a childhood that wasn’t honest (he only learned at age 14 that he was adopted by his father when a cousin used this information to publicly shame him), rejection by his family as an adult, and a biological father who resurfaced many hidden childhood traumas when he attempted to connect with him later in life.

We shed many tears together during those weeks, perched at the end of my parents’ bed, sifting through clues. We cried for the secrets he kept and the sadness we should have seen. We shared none of this with friends or even extended family. It wasn’t something anyone knew how to talk about. They didn’t ask and we didn’t tell.

We cried for the secrets he kept and the sadness we should have seen.

In the suicide prevention field, we are careful to say that suicide is multifactorial. To attempt to point to a single cause is to miss the larger picture, so we train people to look for what are considered the “red flags” of a mental health crisis. While that’s a very helpful framework for increasing awareness about what a mental health crisis looks like, what I’ve learned in more than 25 years of clinical practice is something that is not often advertised: Those red flags sometimes become a faded pink, and tattered. That makes them a lot harder to spot.

Dorrit

As soon as the cops left my house that morning, I called my parents. My mom got on the first flight to Providence, Rhode Island, and slept in my bed with me for 10 days. She carried the grief heavier than most, talking nonstop about how she could have done more to help Jameson. But I now know that you can only support, not save, someone.

Katie

As we cleaned out my childhood home to prepare to sell it, my mom and I found those tattered and faded flags: a note on a torn scrap of paper from a yellow legal pad (he was not a lawyer, but he loved those pads), detailing what my mom should do about one of the leased cars in the driveway; a stack of birthday cards from all of us dating 10 years back with some version of “I’m sorry this was a hard year, next year will be better”; and a cassette tape from a visit he made to a psychic medium exactly two years before his death.

He had cleaned out his closet shortly before he died, declaring many styles out of date, but when we opened the closet, we discovered that he didn’t leave much behind. We think he tried to help us.

Finally, the words he said over the previous couple of years took on new and revelatory meaning as we replayed them over and over in our minds.

If I die and you remarry, you’ll need to sign a prenup.

I’m probably worth more dead than alive.

When I’m gone, you’ll want to move to the beach.

We pieced the clues together and processed the depth of the loss side by side, but it would be months before we really began to call it what it was: loss by suicide.

Support for Survivors

Dorrit

Courtesy of Corwin

Dorrit Corwin and her boyfriend, Jameson

When it comes to processing and talking about suicide, some resources have improved over the past 25 years, and some stigmas have eroded, but others have not.

The best resource I used was a virtual support group through Coping After Suicide. This community is something Katie never could have found in 1998, most obviously because Zoom was not a thing, but also because there was not as much dialogue around suicide as there is now. I was in a group called “twentysomethings”; while each member of the group had different relationships to the people they lost (parents, siblings, partners, friends), we were bonded by all being in our 20s. We met once a week for 90 minutes over a 10-week period.

These 90-minute chunks became both a highlight and a challenge of my week. I felt seen by this group of people I would never meet in person.

Another wonderful resource I turn to again and again is Anderson Cooper’s podcast, “All There Is,” where he openly discusses the grief of losing his father (when he was 10), his mother (who lived to 95), and his brother, who died by suicide when Cooper was 21.

I felt seen by this group of people I would never meet in person.

He interviews guests from Stephen Colbert and Andrew Garfield to Whoopi Goldberg and Doris Kearns Goodwin. This podcast would not have existed 25 years ago, and while it is not entirely about suicide, survivors of all types of grief can benefit from listening and learning from Cooper’s brave vulnerability.

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

The Right Words

Katie

Language matters. A lot. When people are sick with cancer or heart disease, we say it. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, it was hard to wrap my head around my new reality, but it wasn’t hard to say the words. Mental health is different. There are “Fuck Cancer” T-shirts but no “Fuck Suicide” T-shirts. There should be.

We have worked hard to decrease stigma around cancer, diabetes, and many other medical diseases, but when I say I have depression, it’s always a showstopper. When people ask how my father died, the discomfort is palpable when I reply with four simple words: “He died by suicide.” I choose to believe that discomfort comes from a place of compassionate grief. It is unfathomable to consider a father of four dying by suicide at age 52, the age my husband just reached, and that makes it hard to respond in any kind of meaningful way. In the absence of knowing what to say, people tend to shuffle their feet, look down, and wait for the moment to pass.

We need to do better, in both responses and the words we use. Think about how often you hear phrases like “He’s crazy,” “I want to kill myself,” or “That’s social suicide” in casual conversation. Even the word combination of “commit suicide” is steeped in stigma. People commit crimes, but suicide is no crime. People use these phrases to make a joke or exaggerate a point, but for survivors of suicide loss, those words, and many others, hurt us inside.

There are simple swaps we can learn to speak in a more compassionate way:

- Instead of “committed/completed/successful suicide” say “died by suicide”

- Instead of “he’s suicidal” say “he has thoughts of suicide”

- Instead of “failed/incomplete/unsuccessful attempt” say “suicide attempt”

- Instead of suicide jokes, in words or gestures, just don’t do that. Given that we lose one person to suicide every 11 minutes, assume that someone in your presence has some experience with loss by suicide.

Words can hurt, but words can also heal. When someone opens up about—or even mentions—a loss by suicide, the simplest thing you can do is respond with, “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you want to tell me more about ?” or “How can I support you?”

A Clear Purpose: Prevention

Katie

Almost three years ago I was given the opportunity to join The Jed Foundation (JED), a leading nonprofit that works to protect emotional health and reduce suicide for teens and young adults. JED was founded in 2000 by Donna and Phil Satow, whose son, Jed, died by suicide while in college. My father died in April of 1998; Jed died that following December.

Awareness now is higher than it’s ever been, and while that’s not saying much, there’s at least a foundation to build on. In 2025, people working in the suicide prevention field know a lot more about what to look for and how to help someone in crisis and, because of that, we have a better chance of helping someone through a crisis. Warning signs can include:

- Talking about suicide, with or without a specific plan

- Verbalizing or writing about feeling alone, disconnected, or empty

- Feeling like a burden; mentioning that others will be better off when they’re gone

- Noticeable changes in sleep and eating habits

- Noticeable changes in personal hygiene

- Social withdrawal, not engaging in activities they usually enjoy

- Reckless behavior

- Increased agitation, irritability, anger, and/or anxiety

- Mood swings

- Feeling numb or disinterested

- Persistent sadness or depression

- Hopelessness

People often ask me what it’s like to work in suicide prevention. They wonder if it’s sad, overwhelming, or all-encompassing. The truth is that it can be one or all of those things at times, but the emotion I feel most is hope.

Gen Z is talking more openly about mental health, and that’s a very good thing. There’s still a stigma around help-seeking, particularly for young males, and we have work to do to build trust with young people, to show them that caring adults are willing to decenter themselves to help them. But we need to work faster and we need to work together.

Gen Z is talking more openly about mental health, and that’s a very good thing.

JED’s signature “You Can Help” workshops are adapted to meet the needs of many audiences, and Mental Health First Aid, ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training), and QPR (Question, Persuade, Refer) are all examples of trainings that can help people learn to identify the warning signs, support a person in need, and refer for professional help.

Beyond collective learning, a small but mighty action we can all take to improve our understanding of and relationship with mental health is to learn how to talk about it. When parents are worried about their kids but can’t find the words to discuss their fears, I often task them with spending time in the mirror practicing the words they need to say:

- How is your mental health?

- Do you want me to help you find a therapist?

- Are you having thoughts of suicide?

A fear I frequently hear is that talking about depression and suicide will plant the ideas in kids’ heads, thereby causing depression and, potentially, suicide. That isn’t the case. The more we practice using these words and phrases, the more trust we build with the young people who need us to listen with empathy and compassion. We can only destigmatize language if we use it, and that’s a task we need to take on as a whole.

Courtesy Hurley and Corwin

Katie Hurley and her niece, Dorrit Corwin

“If I Had One Wish”

Katie

I would love to say that Dorrit faces less stigma when talking about Jameson’s death than I did when talking about my dad, but I know enough to know that open conversation about depression and suicide only exists in some small settings. It’s a club, this group of us survivors of loss by suicide. With fellow survivors we can share without burden or worry and talk openly about the wounds that never quite heal in the way we hope. We can listen to one another and create the brave spaces we’ve needed all along.

But if I had one wish, it would be that we wouldn’t need a secret club of silent understanding, that all people could find a way to talk openly about mental health and suicide and listen without judgment when others share their story. When that day comes, we’ll find that we have more in common than we think and that we have more support than we could ever imagine. Only when we can talk honestly about mental health, like we talk about any other disease, and provide the same kind of support that we would provide a family enduring any other kind of illness (pass the casserole, please) will we have eradicated the stigma and learned to truly comfort one another through any kind of storm. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16641

Kids often keep their worries hidden, or express them in ways that are hard to read

Writer: Stephanie Cornwell

Clinical Expert: David Friedlander, PsyD

What You'll Learn

- How does depression look different in children, teens, and adults?

- How can parents help their kids deal with depression?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Symptoms of depression

- Depression in young children and pre-teens

- Depression in teenagers

- How parents can help with treatment

- How Depression Affects Kids in School

Depression can affect people of any age, but it can be confusing because it often looks different in children, teens, and adults. Depression is typically characterized by feeling sad, empty, or hopeless most of the day, nearly every day. For kids and teens, however, irritability can replace sadness.

The biggest thing to look for in kids is a change in behavior — It’s not just that the child is cranky or down, but that those behaviors are not typical for that child. For children, the change could be a heightened sensitivity to criticism, withdrawal from activities they used to enjoy, and somatic complaints like stomachaches and headaches. In teenagers, social isolation, poor school performance, substance abuse, and self-harm can be symptoms of depression.

If you hear your child talking about attempting suicide, it’s important to talk to them. Depression is treatable, with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) being the most common and evidence-based treatment. Medications may also be used in combination with therapy.

Depression can affect people of any age, but it can be confusing because it often looks different in children, teens, and adults. And since teens are already prone to moodiness, it can be especially hard to tell if they are struggling with depression.

Knowing the signs of depression and how they differ across age ranges can better equip you to get your child help if they need it.

Symptoms of depression

For a person of any age, adiagnosis of depression is typically based on feeling sad, empty, or hopeless most of the day, nearly every day. Other common symptoms include diminished interest in activities they once enjoyed, eating more or less than usual, not sleeping enough or too much, withdrawing from friends and family, and having thoughts of suicide.

For kids and teens, however, irritability can replace sadness. If your child is unusually irritable for no reason, that could be a sign of depression. But it’s more about changes in their behavior than the symptoms themselves.

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Depression in young children and pre-teens

The key is spotting depression in young kids is to look for a change in behavior, explains David Friedlander, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. It’s not just that the child is cranky or down but that those behaviors are not typical for that child.

Say your child used to put their homework neatly in a folder in their backpack, and now it’s crumpled in a ball at the bottom of the bag. Maybe they’re suddenly getting into fights or breaking rules in school when they’ve never done that before. Also, a heightened sensitivity to mistakes or criticism, like crying over getting an answer wrong when they used to shrug it off, can be a sign of depression.

Withdrawing from things they used to enjoy is a telltale sign of depression. Young kids rely heavily on their parents to get them to and from activities. So, withdrawal in young kids can look like asking to skip dance class repeatedly or telling their parents not to sign them up for sports anymore.

If kids frequently say something like, “I don’t want to,” or “I can’t,” it could signify that they are struggling with depression, “especially if you’re dealing with a kid who used to have joy for life and age-appropriate participation in activities,” Dr. Friedlander says.

Another sign of depression is sudden and frequent somatic complaints that weren’t there before, like stomachaches and headaches. Stomachaches generally don’t mean your child is depressed, but suddenly having a lot of stomachaches when they didn’t before might. 

If your child is unusually irritable for no reason, even without sadness, that could be a sign of depression. However, there’s also a related mood disorder that’s sometimes diagnosed in extremely irritable kids called disruptive mood dysregulation disorder, which presents as extreme tantrums combined with irritability.

Depression in teenagers

Teenagers are notoriously moody, and often their mood swings aren’t a cause for concern. But if your teenager is much more irritable than they used to be, it could also be a sign of depression. “That’s really the key differentiator,” Dr. Friedlander says. “Teens are sometimes going to be irritable, but if they’re irritable most of the day, nearly every day, that’s one of the criteria for depression.”

As in younger children, social isolation is a major sign of depression in teens. Social isolation and attempts to withdraw can be more than just staying in their room. If they are usually with their friends after school but suddenly start coming home right after, it’s worth talking to them about it. While it’s not unusual for teens to have problems with friends, if your child says, “I’m not friends with so-and-so anymore,” you may want to ask about it.

Another change in behavior to look for in teens is school performance. If they’re suddenly getting D’s and F’s when they used to get good grades, and they’re blaming fatigue or an inability to concentrate, it might be a sign of depression.

Another thing to worry about in teens is self-harm; the most common form is cutting. Teens may cut because they are in intense distress, and the cutting makes them stop ruminating on whatever upsets them.

The most serious thing to look for is if your child is thinking about or attempting suicide. If you hear your child talking about dying, wishing they could disappear, or hurting themselves, it’s important to take it seriously and have an open and honest conversation about what’s happening. Though parents often worry that talking about suicide will make the problem worse, in fact, the evidence is clear that it helps kids to express their feelings, and it gives you an important opportunity to gauge whether they are at risk of hurting themselves and should be taken to the emergency room.

Substance abuse may also be a symptom of depression in teens. Dr. Friedlander notes that parents would have to determine the purpose of the substance use to find out if it’s linked to depression. What is your teen trying to achieve by smoking or drinking? What are they trying to avoid? “Anhedonia, the inability to experience pleasure, is a symptom of depression,” Dr. Friedlander explains. “If being high is the only way the child can have fun, that’s a sign they may be depressed.”

How parents can help with treatment

Depression is treatable. The most common, evidence-based treatment for depression is cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which teaches kids to notice and challenge negative, destructive thought patterns. There are several forms of CBT adapted for children and teenagers with depression, including DBT and IPT.

Medications are also used, sometimes in combination with therapy. The most frequently used antidepressant medications include SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors), like Zoloft, Prozac, and Lexapro, and SNRIs (serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors), like Strattera and Cymbalta. 

When it comes to treating younger kids, the parents usually need to be involved more. Parents of an eight-year-old, for example, will need to help schedule activities, make sure the child attends them, and provide incentives to continue completing the activities. With teens, parents’ involvement in the treatment of their depression varies. “Some are motivated enough to follow through on a treatment regimen with minimal support and prefer privacy over involving their parents,” Dr. Friedlander notes. Others need more support or incentives.  

If you think your child or teenager is suicidal, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or 911 if there is an emergency. Don’t wait — the risk of suicide in children and teenagers is very real.  https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16652

Kids often keep their worries hidden, or express them in ways that are hard to read

Writer: Roy Boorady, MD

Clinical Expert: Roy Boorady, MD

What You'll Learn

- What does childhood anxiety look like?

- Why is it difficult to diagnose childhood anxiety?

- How is childhood anxiety treated?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Outward signs of childhood anxiety

- Consequences of untreated anxiety

- Avoidance reinforces anxiety

- Anxiety leads to depression

All kids worry sometimes. But when worry makes it hard for them to participate in daily life, they may have an anxiety disorder. Because anxiety often affects a child’s thoughts and feelings more than it affects their behavior, it can be hard to spot. It’s also possible for a child to be generally happy but still so anxious that it interferes with some aspect of their life, like school or socializing.

Common outward signs that a child might be anxious include troubling sleeping, lots of stomachaches or headaches, clinging to parents, and throwing tantrums. Some of these symptoms may look like oppositional behavior, but really the child is struggling to deal with overwhelming worry. Anxiety can also make it hard to focus or sit still, so it can be hard to tell anxiety apart from ADHD.

Untreated anxiety in childhood can lead to more anxiety in adulthood, so it’s important to get anxious kids help. The good news is that childhood anxiety is very treatable. Most anxious kids respond well to a kind of therapy called cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Medication can also help. By getting treatment early, kids can learn to manage their worries and keep anxiety from interfering with their lives.

It is a natural thing to have anxiety. It is normal for very young children to be afraid of the dark, or for school-age children to worry about making friends. But sometimes normal childhood anxiety morphs into something more serious. A young girl might be afraid to ever leave her mother’s side, even to get on the school bus, or an anxious boy may need frequent reassurance over things that happened a month ago.

Even young children can develop an anxiety disorder. Eventually the disorder can start interfering with a child’s friendships, life at home, and work in school. Even so, the anxiety still might not be noticeable to parents and caregivers.

For one thing, being anxious doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t function — it might just make some kinds of functioning more difficult. A homework assignment that should take 20 minutes might take an hour, for example. With anxiety, it’s important to remember how internal it is. It dominates a child’s thoughts, but it might not be obvious to the people around them.

It’s also worth noting that in my work as a child psychiatrist I see a lot of anxious kids who are still basically happy and enjoying life. Maybe they are only struggling in certain situations, which may make their anxiety all the easier to overlook.

Outward signs of childhood anxiety

When anxiety is expressed outwardly, there can be a wide range of signs and symptoms, which often complicates identification.

- Kids may have trouble sleeping or complain about stomachaches or other physical problems.

- They may become avoidant and clingy around parents or caregivers.

- They might also have trouble focusing in class or be very fidgety — I like to say, “Not all that moves is ADHD,” even though that’s often the first thing we suspect from a hyperactive or inattentive child.

- They may have explosive outbursts that make people think they are oppositional, when their fight-or-flight mechanism is triggered.

The words we use to describe our anxiety can distract, too. People use a lot of different words to describe what they’re feeling — kids might say they are self-conscious, shy, apprehensive, worried, or afraid. These words do a good job capturing what they are struggling with, but fixating too much on them can distract from the fact that anxiety is underlying factor — not some personal failure in personality. 

Consequences of untreated anxiety

If you look at the prevalence rates of anxiety disorders, you’ll see that the numbers rise as children get older. That makes sense because anxiety disorders are cognitive, so they develop as our cognitive ability develops. Separation anxiety, for instance, develops early, where as social anxiety disorder usually develops after puberty. A study of more than 10,000 kids, interviewed by trained professionals, shows that more than 30 percent had developed an anxiety disorder some time before they were 18.

Anxiety frequently recurs, too, and childhood anxiety is often a precursor for adult anxiety, especially for kids who don’t receive treatment. The same study showed that 80 percent of kids with anxiety do not get treatment. Many adults seeking help for anxiety remember feeling anxious when they were younger, which means that they’ve been struggling for a long time and could have benefited from treatment as children.

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Avoidance reinforces anxiety

Kids with untreated anxiety also begin to develop poor coping skills. A common example is avoidance — people who are very anxious will try to contain it by avoiding the thing that makes them anxious. It’s a short-term solution that unfortunately reinforces their anxiety instead of acclimating them to it.

Similarly, untreated anxiety can lead to lower self-esteem, academic dysfunction, and self-medication through substance abuse.

Anxiety leads to depression

People living with anxiety for extended periods of time are also more likely to develop depression. It isn’t uncommon to meet patients who come seeking treatment for depression or depressive symptoms and it turns out that they have been dealing with lifelong anxiety as well. In cases like this people need treatment for anxiety and depression.

Fortunately, we know a lot about how to treat anxiety. It responds very well to cognitive behavior therapy, and there are medications that work, too. Getting help makes a big difference, and treatment doesn’t need to be a lifelong thing — although its positive effects will be.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does anxiety look like in a child?

Anxiety in a child can look like many different kinds of symptoms. Anxious children may have trouble sleeping, complain about stomachaches, avoid certain places or things, cling to parents, have trouble focusing in school, or have extreme tantrums when they get overwhelmed. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16644

The former wide receiver’s passing comes as suicide rates among young Black men climb sharply, especially in Georgia

by Alyssa Johnson

Rondale Moore warms up prior to a game between the Atlanta Falcons and the Carolina Panthers in Atlanta

We can bring these stories to you!

When news broke last week that Rondale Moore, a 25-year-old former Atlanta Falcons player, died by a suspected self-inflicted gunshot wound, it stunned fans and coaches while raising alarm with mental health professionals. 

Authorities in New Albany, Indiana, said Moore was found dead in the garage of a property in the area and that his death is under investigation.

Moore’s death highlights a broader public-health crisis: the rise of suicide among young adults, especially young Black men, in the U.S. and in Georgia.

Analysis from Stateline using federal data shows that suicide is claiming more lives among Gen Z adults, roughly ages 18 to 27, than it did a decade ago when millennials were the same age. 

The report found that the increase is not evenly spread across populations, as 85% of the growth in suicide deaths among Gen Z is among Black and Hispanic men, with the largest spikes occurring in Southern and Midwestern states, including Georgia.

In Georgia, the increase in suicide among men 18 to 27 was among the highest in the nation, rising by 70% between 2014 and 2024.

Michael Giglio, executive director of Giving Health, a nonprofit organization that offers free virtual primary care and mental health services for low income and uninsured residents, said that the majority of its clients are Black and face barriers to accessing mental health services.

“It can be very difficult to access affordable mental health services, and in Georgia, further complicating the challenges, there’s a significant shortfall in the number of mental health providers for population size,” Giglio said. 

Giglio said that the lack of access to mental health services and support from community or individual relationships play a large role in male suicides.

“Those three things can really overwhelm and overcome someone who’s struggling, that doesn’t have a trusted, intimate relationship with a friend, a family member, a partner, and doesn’t have the resources to seek out counseling, or there may be cultural hesitation to pursue counseling as well,” Giglio said.

Giglio said some of the stressors facing men who may be experiencing suicidal thoughts could be anything from finances to a history of abuse and trauma — and for Black men in particular, race-related trauma. 

A study from the University of Georgia in 2024 revealed that being raised in an environment with limited resources and facing racial discrimination in early adulthood can hinder the ability to form healthy, trusting relationships. Deep mistrust and wariness toward others may result in social isolation, which can ultimately lead to thoughts of death and suicide.

“I think we often don’t look at where the disparities are and who the individuals most at risk are when we’re talking about suicide ideation,” Michael Curtis, co-author of the study, told UGA Today. “We just know it’s bad, and particularly among young Black men.”

“Historically, research has not invested a lot of time and effort in looking into what are the unique cultural contexts that make certain men more at risk for suicidal thoughts than other men,” Curtis said.

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

In an interview last year with Capital B Atlanta, Morehouse College President F. DuBois Bowman said that the all-male HBCU is working to increase services to address the mental health issues of its students after a spate of suicides in recent years.  

“One of the things we’ve seen shifting very rapidly is the demand for increased mental health support. That is on college campuses, but in society more broadly,” Bowman said.

“We see issues of anxiety. We see issues of depression show up on our campus with excellent students who are very capable of succeeding, but we have to make sure we figure out how to support them in their journeys,” he said. “I think it’s our responsibility at Morehouse, and in the higher education landscape more generally, to think about how best to do so.”

A standout at Purdue University, Moore was selected in the second round of the 2021 NFL Draft by the Arizona Cardinals. After three seasons in Arizona, he was traded to the Atlanta Falcons in 2024 but suffered a knee injury during training camp, preventing him from ever playing a game for Atlanta. 

He was remembered by the team on social media: “Rest in peace, Rondale Moore. Our thoughts and prayers are with Rondale’s family and friends.”

If you or someone you know is thinking about self-harm, call or text 988 to connect with the National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, and speak with a compassionate, trained counselor 24/7. This service is free and confidential. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16639

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0rVwulxZ8k

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16634

And how does it affect children and teenagers?

Writer: Caroline Miller

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgIPkigb8dI

What You'll Learn

- How does binge eating develop in children and teenagers?

- What is loss of control eating?

- How can we help kids with binge eating or loss of control eating?

- Quick Read

- Full Article

- Kids and binge eating disorder

- Diagnosing binge eating disorder

- How are kids different from adults with BED?

- Who is at risk for binge eating disorder?

- Treatment for binge eating disorder

- CBT for binge eating in teenagers

- IPT for binge eating in teenagers

- Scalable treatments

Binge eating — consuming an unusually large amount of food in a short period of time — was classified as an eating disorder in 2013. It is usually diagnosed in teenagers and young adults, but children can also develop binge eating.

One of the characteristics of binge eating is that the person feels they have lost control of their eating. They feel they can’t stop eating. And this loss of control (LOC) eating sometimes develops in children (as young as eight years old) who will later develop full-blown binge eating disorder (BED). So identifying and treating children with LOC eating could be an important way to prevent adult BED and weight gain.

Adults with BED usually report that their eating binges are triggered by negative feelings, but kids generally don’t. Instead they describe feeling zoned out. And rather than intending or planning to binge, they tend to do it when an opportunity arises, such as after school when parents aren’t home or are otherwise occupied. BED is often diagnosed in teenagers who are looking for weight loss treatment, who may not even realize they have an eating disorder.

Most of the research on BED has been done in adults with the disorder, but experts are adapting adult treatments for adolescents and children. Two kinds of therapy are being used to help kids with binge eating.

In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) kids learn to change their eating habits to prioritize regular meals and healthy foods. They also work on self-regulation and impulse-control skills.

In interpersonal therapy (IPT), kids get help improving relationships that may be troubling them, triggering binge eating episodes.

Binge eating, which involves consuming an unusually large amount of food in a short time, has long been associated with weight problems and psychological distress.  But it’s only since 2013 that repeatedbinge eating has been classified as an eating disorder. Binge eating disorder is usually first diagnosed in teenagers or young adults, but it can also occur in children.

It’s not just the unusual amount of food eaten that defines binge eating. People with the disorder also report feeling a loss of control while eating. And when it comes to children and adolescents who struggle with binge eating, experts say it’s more useful to focus on the “loss of control” experience than the amount of food consumed in an eating binge.

That’s in part because when you’re talking about kids, it’s hard to be clear what “large amount” means — it varies for different ages, genders anddevelopmental stages, explains Marian Tanofsky-Kraff, PhD, a researcher of binge eating in youth and a professor at the Uniformed Services University School of Medicine. “If you have a 14-year-old boy going through a burst of puberty, he could easily eat a whole pizza. Is that large?” asks Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff. “What about an eight-year-old girl who’s eating four slices of pizza? Is that too much?”

But it’s also important to focus on the loss of control (LOC) experience because it’s a behavior that often appears in kids before they have developed full-blown binge eating disorder (BED). Kids who have episodes of LOC eating — regardless of the amount eaten — have been shown to be at higher risk for developing BED and adult obesity. So interventions that treat LOC eating in kids may be an important way to prevent BED.

Kids and binge eating disorder

Most young people who are diagnosed with BED are identified because they are seeking treatment for obesity, explains Andrea Goldschmidt, PhD, an associate professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine whose research focuses on LOC. They often don’t know they have an eating disorder.

“When I ask kids and their families where they want to start, often times it will be weight loss,” Dr. Goldschmidt says. “And we have to help them understand that the thing they need to work on before they can lose the weight is managing their binge eating.”

Binge eating disorder is rarely flagged by pediatricians and other doctors. That is in part because doctors don’t think of eating disorders when they see a patient at an above average or higher weight, notes Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff. But more broadly, doctors often avoid talking to kids about their weight, for fear of undermining their self-esteem.

Drs. Goldschmidt and Tanofsky-Kraff report seeing LOC eating in kids as young as eight years old. And they’ve seen kids with the full-blown BED as young as 12 or 13.

Diagnosing binge eating disorder

The primary symptoms of BED are recurring episodes of binge eating. Those episodes are defined by eating more food than most people would consume in a discrete period of time — for instance, within a 2-hour period — and a sense of lack of control over eating during the episode. A person with BED feels unable to stop.

The episodes may also be characterized by:

- Eating much more rapidly than normal

- Eating until feeling uncomfortably full

- Eating large amounts of food when not feeling physically hungry

- Eating alone because of feeling embarrassed by how much one is eating

- Feeling disgusted with oneself, depressed or very guilty afterward

For a BED diagnosis, these episodes must occur at least once a week, have continued for 3 months, and be causing serious distress. Individuals with the disorder are typically ashamed of their eating problems and often eat in secret to hide their symptoms.

How are kids different from adults with BED?

While adults who have BED tend to say their episodes are triggered by negative feelings, younger kids generally don’t connect them to feeling bad. That may be because they’re not able to articulate their feelings, Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff notes. “A lot of children talk about feeling like they’re zoning out or paralyzed. They describe a sort of numbing out when they’re eating. We’re not 100 percent sure why, but we think part of it is because they’re using food to cope, to deal with aversive feelings.”

Unlike adults with the disorder, kids don’t tend to plan for binges. Instead, the episodes happen when there is an opportunity.

Often kids report that they don’t eat regularly during the school day. “I will often hear that they don’t want to bring a packed lunch and say the food at school is gross, so they’re coming home from school very hungry,” explains Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff. “Maybe nobody else is home, or their parents are busy doing something else. Those after-school hours can be the prime risk period for loss-of-control eating.”

Who is at risk for binge eating disorder?

Like other eating disorders, girls are more likely to develop BED than boys. And the disorder is highly heritable.

Young people who have been engaging in unhealthy dieting to lose weight are also at higher risk for BED. They restrict their eating so much that they become famished, and they feel deprived. Then they end up overeating and feeling out of control later.

Research led by Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff published in American Psychologist proposes that there are several factors that, combined, may increase the development of BED and high weight among youth who report LOC eating behaviors. They are:

- Negative mood: experiencing depression, anxiety, stress or interpersonal difficulties

- Responsiveness to foods: being particularly sensitive to food as rewarding

- Executive functioning issues: poor impulse control and self-regulation skills

Research has also found that a greater percentage of kids with ADHD have recurring LOC incidents than kids without ADHD.

Treatment for binge eating disorder

Treatment for BED has been studied more in adults than teenagers.  For adults, several forms of therapy have been shown to be effective.

- Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT): CBT is the most studied and well-established form of therapy for BED. CBT works with patients to normalize eating patterns, develop self-control and modify negative views of themselves in order to reduce binge eating.

- Interpersonal psychotherapy (IPT): IPT focuses on improving interpersonal skills to foster healthy relationships and a positive self-image, and helps individuals manage negative feelings without turning to food.

- Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT): DBT focuses on improving emotional regulation skills to avoid using binge eating as a way of responding to painful emotional experience.

There are three kinds of medicine that have been found to help reduce BED in adults, sometimes in conjunction with therapy:

- Stimulant medications developed for ADHD, which may reduce impulsiveness (Vyvanse is FDA-approved for BED in adults).

- Antidepressants, including SSRIs, which may reduce binges by boosting mood.

- Anti-seizure drugs like Topamax, which help stabilize mood and reduce impulse control problems.

Drs. Goldschmidt and Tanofsky-Kraff are both involved in adapting adult treatments for use with teenagers. They emphasize that there is not yet enough research to establish a gold standard treatment for kids with the disorder.

CBT for binge eating in teenagers

Dr. Goldschmidt uses CBT to help young people reset their eating habits to reduce extreme dieting and prioritize regular eating and flexibility with respect to food choices. There is also a big focus on helping kids improve their self-regulation around eating, and strengthening self-regulation skills in general.

Dr. Goldschmidt sees promise in web-based interventions for teenagers, given how much they are online already, and because issues like access and stigma might limit their willingness to engage in face-to-face therapy. In her work, she uses smartphones to collect data on how kids are feeling and what they’re doing, including eating. It’s called “ecological momentary assessment.”

“We ping them throughout the day, or they respond to surveys at the time that they have an eating episode,” Dr. Goldschmidt explains, “and they’re answering a series of questions about where they are, who they are with, how they are feeling, and what they are doing.”

This allows clinicians to offer guidance in real time. “We can identify the momentary factors, as they’re occurring, that are going to trigger a binge eating episode, and we can intervene in the moment to tell them, ‘It looks like you’re heading into a party with your friends. Let’s think about the ways that you’re going to avoid overeating at the buffet table,’” Dr. Goldschmidt adds.

Once patterns are established, Dr. Goldschmidt says, teens can be sent periodic reminders for high-risk situations, or when they’re likely to be experiencing a trigger, to remind them to practice skills they have learned. Dr. Goldschmidt calls this technology-based treatment “CBT augmented by self-regulation interventions.”

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

IPT for binge eating in teenagers

Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff advocates using IPT, which is focused on helping the child to understand relationship issues that may make them turn to overeating.  

Kids who are binge eating are usually struggling with relationships, she says. You might assume that their biggest concerns would be friendships and acceptance by peers, she adds, but it’s usually stressors with their parents. “We did a study where we looked at all the problem areas to see what was it that was prompting their loss of control episodes, and it was most frequently difficulties with their parents.”

IPT helps kids focus on interpersonal issues that are related to their eating. “For instance,” she notes, “if every day when you come home from school you’re having a battle with your mom, you feel badly, and you use food to cope.”

Dr. Tanofsky-Kraff stresses that IPT improves not only kids’ eating habits but also their lives. “It goes deeper, to what is promoting the loss of control. It also improves relationships and mood symptoms, and loss of control is highly comorbid with things like anxiety and depression.”

Scalable treatments

Dr. Goldschmidt notes the importance of developing scalable interventions that could be used to get care to kids who may have poor access to mental health professionals. “We know that binge eating affects kids who are under-resourced, maybe come from minority populations, like racial and ethnic minority youth, and don’t have adequate insurance coverage.”  

She sees hope in the use of technology like smartphones that could enable short-term treatment that targets the eating behaviors and starts to address the mechanisms, though she recognizes that this kind of treatment “is not going to cover all of the bases in terms of what’s underlying the eating disorder.”

Frequently Asked Questions

What is binge eating disorder (BED)?

Binge eating disorder (BED) involves eating unusually large amounts of food in a short time and a feeling of loss of control. A person with BED feels they can’t stop eating. Loss of control (LOC) eating sometimes develops in children as young as eight years old who can later develop binge eating disorder.

What are binges usually triggered by?

What is the treatment for binge eating disorder? https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16630

A person sitting and feeling depressed on bed with city view in dusk moment. Stay home, depression and loneliness concept.

Christopher Brown, Staff Writer

Content warning: mentions of sexual assault and suicide.

Suicide is one of the leading causes of death among Americans, including college students. Conversations about mental health often center on those visibly struggling, but visibility and risk are not the same. Stigma and misconceptions around men’s mental health, in particular, prevent many from receiving help.   

“Mental health normal,” senior and president of the Men’s Mental Health Club (MMHC) at Villanova, Zander DeLuca, said. “It’s something that everyone—male and female—goes through, and it is a shame that it’s so stigmatized, specifically in the male community, just based on how men were grown and raised.”  

Men account for roughly 75 to 80% of suicide deaths per year. CDC data reports 38,925 male lives lost in 2024 alone. SAMHSA data further indicate that adults aged 18 to 25 report the highest prevalence of suicidal thoughts, with similar rates among men and women.  

In 2019, a study of children and young adults (ages 12 to 29) in the Journal of Adolescent Health focusing on LGBT youth also shed light on suicide among non-LGBT youth. It emphasized the need for inclusive prevention strategies. DeLuca cautions against generalizing experiences, noting that people cope, behave and grow up differently. 

  Non-LGBT youth accounted for roughly 90% of the cases in the study, and four of every five of those were male. In addition, the data confirmed disquieting truths about suicide in young men.  

First, most non-LGBT male suicide cases had no history of mental illness. Relationship issues were commonly reported. Seven out of ten (1,100) of the men and boys in the study had no mental illness before death. 62% of them faced intimate partner problems, ranging from bad breakups and cheating to ongoing conflicts. It even included experiences of physical or emotional abuse. 

Recent national survey data from the CDC/NISVS corroborate these findings. They indicate that nearly one in three men experience intimate partner violence. Most of it occurs before turning 25. About 1-in-4 report experiencing sexual violence, and 1-in-14 report being made to penetrate. These experiences are often underreported, stigmatized or subject to differing legal classifications.  

Villanova University survey data show that male students who experience relationship or sexual violence often describe similar experiences to female survivors. Given how frequently relationship issues appear, small shifts in how peers respond may be critical. DeLuca suggested asking “Are you okay?” or “How can I help?” to start conversations that a casual “How are you?” cannot. 

#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation
website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy

Click Here For More Information About James Donaldson

Click here to follow James Donaldson's Blog

Male survivors often report difficulty recognizing or disclosing abuse. Social expectations around masculinity can discourage vulnerability. Public narratives frequently emphasize men as perpetrators of violence while stories of male victims and female-perpetrated violence receive less attention in comparison, making it harder for male survivors and anyone harmed by a female perpetrator to seek help or recognize their abuse. 

Perhaps the most unsettling truth from the study is that some men already sought help before taking suicidal action. One in six of the men and boys were in treatment for mental illness at the time of death, and about half had a history of suicide attempts or suicidal thoughts as well. Despite this tragedy, that does not mean men talking about their feelings never works, as sophomore and MMHC co-president Luke Brocius can attest. 

“What I learned, especially from talking to some of these presenters and these mental health kinds of people, is that when men do speak out, when men actually do decide to identify and figure out their problems, there is a huge success rate,” Brocius said.

Brocius’ words suggest that outcomes improve significantly when men can identify and address their tribulations early. 

So, the question is: How can modern mental health resources improve success, especially in an academic institution? Anthony Ciliberto, assistant director for Fraternity and Sorority Life, shared his answer. 

“What works is not telling men to be vulnerable, but creating conditions where vulnerability is normalized and rewarded,” Ciliberto said.  

Effective strategies include peer mentorship mixed with small-group dialogue, storytelling from respected male role models and skill-building around emotional literacy. Help-seeking must be framed as a strength rather than a weakness. People must offer multiple entry points to support men, such as conversation, movement, service and creativity. 

Men interested in the MMHC can find more information about them on Instagram @mensmentalhealthvu. The University offers multiple resources for students suffering from mental illness, suicidal ideation, sexual misconduct and more, such as the University Counseling Center and Title IX. Off campus, there are hotlines dedicated to suicide prevention, domestic violence and sexual violence, such as the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. 

Check in on the men you care about. A simple “Are you OK?” or “How can I help?” can potentially save a person’s life.

A person sitting and feeling depressed on bed with city view in dusk moment. Stay home, depression and loneliness concept. https://standingabovethecrowd.com/?p=16625